Matrity without love? If you have raised your eyebrow seeing Melania Trump hidden by the hat, protected by wide aquifer so as not to show emotions. If you thought, when the husband tried to kiss her: “Here we are like, another” wife per fake “, a woman who recites the part” seeing that she portrayed a little, dodging that public effusion.
If the 47th President of the United States setting the United States is shown to you as a Requiem to female independence, to pride, with another woman in the spotlight unable to give up the status of wife, in her case of First Lady, Despite the certified betrayals, the emotional and perhaps political distances, well, it is up to you to reflect us cold.
“The wedding of interest has always existed”
Cold. How do you Gian Ettore Gassani, national president of Italian marriage lawyersthat in his law firm he found himself unraveling many tangled skeins of failed unions: «The wedding for fake has always existed and can have a thousand motivations. For example hide the homosexuality of one of the spouses or bothbecause declaring it is still a taboo; or guarantee the caregiver a legacy or their pension once missed; or marry a beautiful woman, maybe younger who makes image of the Panzuto manager; o Finding an older man with whom he falls in love at first “visa”, not seen, that is, for money; Up to decide to offer citizenship to a non -EU citizen, such as the recent case of 86 -year -old lady who married a Moroccan transsexual; Or simply, not to be alone. Finally, there is the classic of the classics: identifying the chicken to be plucked, once the chickens were only men, Now there are young people on the hunt for the rich woman. Not to mention that in certain environments, it is still important to be married. In short, there are many reasons that are not love. It is the Italian hypocrisy and the West that we think that you should be in love ».
Moreover, Eva Cantarella, a name of reference in the field of ancient society (is historical, sociologist and jurist), admits that much has changed to remain the same, as it reminds us The gotopardo. And he explains it with a tip of bitterness: «Unfortunately, marriage is still a social location for many women. I thought all this would be, I do not say disappeared, but much decreased after the seventies, with feminism, the economic autonomy of the women who work, and instead Wife status is like a screen that saves you to be alone and isolated. In antiquity the figure of the unmarried did not exist, many girls were eliminated at birth, it was families who decided who would get married and who did not. And if you grow up, in case, there was always the convent. In history, we women have basically had a reproductive function. Talking about marriage for love in ancient Greece or in Rome of the times is ridiculous ».
In marriage, the social position counts
Even today a substantial share of marriages in the West is an economic and social investment, where romantic love has little space. (Photo Gallery Stock)
It is staged, the part is recited, there are advantages, You can enjoy the position of “wife or husband per fake”. Sometimes you suffer, but often you get to the buttons room. Isn’t it consumed in the sheets? Patience. Didn’t have affection and complicity? Better to make a reason for it. On the other hand, there is power.
When the wedding gives access to you can
Melania Trump published his first official photo from First Lady: standing in front of a desk, the hands supported, impeccable suit, installation of those who command, much more than the classic icon of the manager woman. Alessandra Neccijournalist, writer, director of museums and author of books on women of the past (Maria Antonietta, Caterina de ‘Medici, Isabella d’Este and Lucrezia Borgia) is lucid when she says: “The women of the past, with enormous skills, are often You can carve out the role they wanted, which is almost always of power. Machiavelli is right: Those who manage power must make very rational assessments. In the majority of cases, the famous women of history have an dryness, a determination … they are “hopeless and without fear”, as Beatrice d’Este said. To the opposite, Those who put love and feelings in front of him, paid him: Maria Antonietta, Maria Stuarda. In history there are many forms».
Alessandra Necci thinks for example at female figures who have accepted white weddings, or the bisexuality of her husband: «Maria Stuarda, already queen of Scotland, accepts marriage with Philip II, dolphin of France, weak, fragile. They do not consume, on the other hand they combine the crowns of France, Scotland, England. Another case: Matilde of Canossa, and here we are in the middle Middle Ages, reigns on boundless domainsin second marriage wedding Guelph of Bavaria, sixteen years old, she is ultra -four years old. We would say a toy boy today. She tries to seduce him, lie down on the table, he doesn’t want it. She slaps him, “you are a worm, a cowardly”, and hunt him. What I mean is that In history there are many variations of husbands or wives for fake. They are agreements, companies, contracts, do ut des. With always power in the middle ».
A third of the weddings today is biting and escaped
Gian Ettore Gassani Ricara: «Marriage is almost always an economic deal And not having faith in the finger is still a dimension, despite female emancipation. Maybe you no longer aim for Prince Charming, but to those who can facilitate you for knowledge, power, professional possibilities. Familism in Italy has always existed: placing well is important. A third of the weddings today is biting and escaped, it does not last long, many are combined with agencies, With an agreement between the parties sometimes written and with easy divorce. The wedding rate has decreased, to increase is the age of the spouses: 30 years ago, he was 23 years old and she 21, today the average is 35 for him and 32 for her ».
The part of the perfect couple is recited, you are inside the family unit for social, economic and children convenience. Without costs? Roberto Berrini, psychotherapist with psychiatric trainingadvances a reflection: “It depends on how much one comes into conflict with the mask that has placed himself on. Sometimes it can develop symptoms: states of anxiety, panic attacks. Cesare Musatti, the well -known psychoanalyst, claimed that the panic attacks in women depended on Fear of leaving the house and betraying her husband. Surely, symptoms are a signal. The “for fake” couple empties the sexual statement linked to affectivity. The betrayal is hosted, sometimes, to keep the marriage together. Maybe we continue to live under the same roof for social convenience or with the alibi of the children, but it is not always possible to share parenting ».
Material and social benefits of being wives
The mask of the good husband and good wife holds, leaves signs and at the same time He defends from the danger of being isolated, from solitude. Because, whether you want it or not, our head is wedge of prejudices, of centuries -old models, almost inscribable. He says Laura Arosio, sociologist of the coupleprofessor associated with the Bicocca University of Milan: «Every time we see a couple that differs from the social rules that we know, there is a suspicion: A rich far ahead with the years with a twenty year old? She or he homosexuals, he looking for dowry …
Still, marriage must not necessarily be based on lovewhich is an invention of the early twentieth century, based on the idea that you are together because you like it and you love yourself. Wrong: love is a source of great instability, because as it has come it can leave. What cares about two people? The material benefitsthe social ones, the frequentations, the lifestyles, the wealth, the idea of building a family, a project. Having a husband or wife is an identity issue, a shared model, he pose us in the comfort area, is perceived as normal. And all this is in great contradiction with the very strong pushes of modernity, especially for womenmore free, more independent, more sexually emancipated. So you get married much less and later, because we understood the contradiction. But it is always important to have a beautiful wife on his side as is the case of Trump, thus giving the idea of being a solid, reliable, successful person ».
Malania may not be happy and proud to accompany herself to a pornstar visitor (while she gives birth), But his convenience found it: from First Lady he launched a crypto currency, $ melania. The website COINMARKETCAP A billion and 700 million dollars assessed it.
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