Column Racheda: ‘Wouldn’t I be a patient mother?’

Racheda also has good intentions, a whole list in fact. But she decides to do it in a completely different way. A surprisingly simple way in which they hopefully succeed one day…

Every year around this time comes that annoying moment. That point at which I painfully have to admit that nothing of my good intentions came to fruition this time either. It feels like a flight of stairs. I always start January with good courage and conviction. Have I just survived the first month of the year, then comes the month that asks quite a lot of you. After all the dark days, February is the extension that I can’t have. Especially not when I’m also confronted with my rubber spine.

Perfectionist

Because I started drinking less and exercising more, right? No more stuffing so much in my mouth in between? Would I be more attentive? Tidy up and clean my house more often and better? Finishing the last chores around the house? Becoming a patient mother? No more grumpy in the kitchen? No more screaming? No more walking out the door angry? No more secretly throwing drawings in the wastepaper basket? Does my list scare you? Then know that a burnout can temper the perfectionist, but getting it out completely, that may never work.

be mild

Well, I found something on it and it turns out to be surprisingly simple. So simple, in fact, that I had to be careful not to immediately speak harshly to myself by saying: couldn’t you have thought of that sooner? I don’t make my New Year’s resolutions on New Year’s Eve, but I’ll wait and see how I do in the first month of the year. In February (exactly at that moment) I will only decide on which points I will adjust. In this I try to be mild and loving and that sometimes works out quite nicely.

rag basket

My plan worked very well this year. I didn’t have a list at the annual New Year’s Eve dinner with friends. In fact, I wasn’t sitting at the table, but was already in bed at 10.15 pm with a bad flu. So I went into the new year without alcohol, oliebollen and other tasty, but unhealthy snacks. It took until mid-January before I had somewhat crawled out of the basket. Then my husband became ill, so the belated New Year’s drinks and dinners were also cancelled. Before I knew it, January was over and I turned out to be it dry to have passed. Due to a lack of cooking appetite, soup was often on the menu. That worked wonders for those few extra pounds. Now just that sports. And being attentive. And being patient. And…

Racheda Kooijman (46) is married to Roeland and has two daughters, Louise (10) and Joselien (8). A year ago she was much too shy for it, but now she does it anyway: writing columns for Libelle, in which she does not shy away from a subject.

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