D.to the Covid-19 emergency at the war in Ukraine it was a moment. As if in the midst of a sigh of relief, all of a sudden, there was no air. We are safe, but psychologically the same cannot be said, because with the images of the gutted cities and the dead they are back anxiety, insomnia and that basic disorientation that makes it difficult, especially for the most sensitive.
The first reason for such disturbance, undoubtedly selfish, is that the Russian-Ukrainian conflict is not only a dot in the global geopolitical balance, but has broken out in Europe, at home. War, then, is an archetype, it contains the greatest fear of the human being, that of death. But there is also more.
War in Ukraine: the fatigue that blocks life
“People are using war as a symbol, they suffer from it to avoid feeling bad for their personal pains, they use it to contain them” explains the doctor Martina Ferrari, psychologist in psychoanalytic training at the Sipre in Rome (Italian Society of Relationship Psychoanalysis) and author of the page Instasogno, among the most followed Instagram communities on a psychological theme. The reactions are different, depending on the personality.
Emotional fatigue is among the possible consequences of the war © Getty Images.
“There are those who remove the gravity of the issue and those who exasperate it, immersing themselves completely in the flow of news, with the risk of remaining anesthetized, especially when they scroll on social media feeds as if they were advertisements”. The most common consequence is the emotional fatigue. «First of all, he presents himself with a fluctuating mood, a lot of nervousness and a feeling of not being able to do everyday things, even the simplest ones, from waking up in the morning to household activities. Even fights are not what they used to be, as if it were no longer worth it. All symptoms of an overload, with the objective difficulty of processing continuous traumatic events within such a long and upsetting period ».
From passive recipients to active subjects: how to react
There is no universal solution to get out of it, but small strategies are useful. “First of all, we must passing from a position of passive receiver to active subject. It helps, for example, to select an association to benefit from; it helps because you participate, albeit in a small way, in solving the problem. Often the information is conflicting, the second advice is to choose a single newspaper to get information, perhaps adding one or two expert disseminators. The most difficult thing, then, is the timing with which you are informed. Better to do it in the morning to have time to process the news during the day. In the evening and at night it is preferable to avoid: readings and images influence sleep, with nightmares, frequent awakenings and negative consequences on the quality of life »concludes Ferrari.
The impact of the war in Ukraine on children
News of the war also affects children and adolescents. “For everyone being exposed to narratives and images with a high perturbing power causes secondary traumatization compared to the real trauma of those who experience certain situations on their own skin “said the doctor Alberto Pellai, developmental psychologist. “This triggers an identification that catapults into a very intense emotional activation, which makes you feel threatened and vulnerable,” continues the expert. “The children they are more sensitive because they do not have cognitive tools capable of producing protective thoughts such as those related to geolocation. Thinking, “I’m in a safe place” is automatic for an adult, not for a child. Furthermore, the younger they are, the more the images of demolished houses and family separations risk striking them because they embody all their deepest fears »continues the specialist.
The (positive) role of adults
Helping them is possible. «The first thing to do is to determine the kind of suggestions they have access to. Adults must remain a safe base with respect to the fearful reactions of the little ones, make them feel protected, both when they talk about certain topics at home and with their expressions. Even the way you move builds a sort of implicit script into which the child inserts his perception of safety. In an adverse situation, seeing a competent adult who does not lose control is fundamental to the need for attachment and security of the little ones ».
War in Ukraine: building a different narrative
Talking about the war to children is right, giving space to two central aspects. “The first is that war is a terrible thing, it must be confirmed that the sense of fear and unease they experience is the same for everyone. Then it is necessary to provide elements of reality, which make it possible not to feel in danger. Children’s questions are usually straightforward, such as: “Can war come here too?”. Or indirect, like: “Mom, can you die?” »Explains Pellai. “When an event of this impact enters the inner world of children, anguish is associated with the big questions they should ask. To help them, for example, it is possible to show where the war is and where we are, or to show that peers or families fleeing war have arrived in our territory: if they come where we are, it means that we are safe. Another useful type of storytelling is that about peace building; telling who is working hard to help is a great way to counterbalance fears ».
A low consumption life
The case of the boys is different. “Like adults, it is helpful for teens to feel part of managing the problem, for example by looking within one’s own community for realities that are working to bring aid to the Ukrainian population. Furthermore, if in your neighborhood there are people who have their families in war zones, it could be important to converse with them, even through school, to understand not only the facts of the macro event, but also the transformations. – ni that are happening in everyday life »explains Pellai. Unlike Covid-19, however, war has a different impact on young people. «The pandemic blocked them objectively, this conflict is linked to concern for the world, but the mandate that life gives us at this moment is to live everyday life with commitment and seriousness. Compared to the days of the pandemic, we are experiencing a moment of opportunity, even in trying to understand what it means to build a low-consumption life, it will be one of the legacies of this war “, adds the specialist.
Those born between 1997 and 2012 suffer from the general situation with destructive and depressive behaviors
Among the children of Generation Z, those born between 1997 and 2012, what they call themselves is growing “Goblin mode”, definition that indicates a person who acts in a wild way and who recently went viral on social media. “It’s the right to suck in a world that is falling apart: since things are bad we might as well not care. Some young people, for example, do nothing to be presentable, eat poorly and little, do not go out, depression is a way of life for them “explains Dr. Ferrari. It is certainly not the right way.
“We are all more fragile and vulnerable,” continues Dr. Pellai. “The past three years have been highly challenging. The people who will be able to live their lives successfully will no longer be those who avoid problems, but who will find a way to navigate within it., living with situations in which one is not omnipotent. The other big challenge is to increase the cooperative dimension. In this, young people have the enormous power to generate generational movements that have always changed the world in the context of contemporary history ».
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