In Wonderland the Caterpillar he smokes, observes and questions Alice with disarming calm: “Who are you?”, he asks her, without really waiting for the answer. He is a character who does not raise his voice, but creates fog. In real life it takes many forms: the colleague who corrects with false kindness, the friend who “jokes” by hurting, the partner that makes you doubt your own perceptions, or the parent who controls with measure and stainless reason. “His weapon is not the verbal slap but ambiguity: he uses language to dominate, not to understand”. With these words, psychotherapist Rita Lombardi introduces her handbook to allow us to understand this mechanism and take the first step to defend ourselves.
