We tend to think that boys and girls do not suffer the consequences of stress and anxiety, that many of their worries “are children’s things & rdquor; and we should not give them too much importance. But the truth is that, according to the Unicef report “State of the World’s Children 2021 & rdquor ;, nine million European adolescents between the ages of 10 and 19 suffer from a mental illness.
This report also notes that anxiety and depression are the most common disorders among European adolescents, being more common among girls (70.1%) than among boys (39.6%).
Anxiety symptoms in boys and girls
Taking these data into account, it is important that we be vigilant in case our children present symptoms that indicate that they may be suffering from stress or anxiety. The psychologist Úrsula Perona highlights the following symptoms:
- Irritability or misbehavior. Children have very little emotional maturation and almost all emotions end up being expressed in the form of bad behavior.
- Excessive tiredness. Feeling of exhaustion, drowsiness…
- Lack of motivation. They don’t feel like playing, going out, going to school… Activities that they used to carry out in their routine, even that used to make them excited, now they don’t feel motivated.
- Whether they are crying or sad, they are overwhelmed by emotions and usually cry quite easily.
- somatization, that is, that children experience pain or discomfort that a priori are not recognized through a medical examination. They are usually gastrointestinal pain and headaches.
- Sleep disorders. A stressed child will probably have worries that may cause difficulties in falling asleep, with many awakenings, nightmares…
- Increase in mania. When a person is more anxious, their manias sometimes increase, and if they had a mania for order, for example, it is increased.
- Changes in diet. They may feel like eating more than usual, or just the opposite, they may have less appetite than usual. They may also ask to eat more sweets or with disordered schedules.
Tips to help our children manage stress and anxiety
Úrsula Perona also gives us tips to identify anxiety in children and help them manage it, as far as possible.
- Take a good look at our children: If we identify any of the above factors in our child, it is important to try to find out what may be influencing him.
- Encourage communication: If our child is a teenager, it is likely that if they are stressed or anxious they will withdraw or isolate themselves from us, which makes the communication process difficult. However, for our part we must provide them with a active listening that promotes communication, that they open up to us when they need it, and that is achieved when they feel that we really care and what they are telling us has a lot of value.
- Legitimize all their emotions and accompany them: Blocking some emotions, denying them or trying to run away from them will not benefit them, quite the opposite. Legitimate, name and accept all the emotions they feel is key to good emotional management.
- Avoid information overload: Let’s help our children manage the amount of information they receive and provide them with the appropriate information based on their age, always looking for reliable and accurate sources.
- Promote responsible use of technologies, that can act as strong stressors for both us and our children:
- spend a lot of time in front of screens It prevents them from doing other things that are healthier for them, such as playing, reading or simply getting bored and staring at the ceiling, which is also necessary.
- Stressors derived from social networks, for example: body image, whether or not their posts have likes, social approval, cyberbullying…
- The continued exposure -sometimes exaggerated- to digital stimuli constitutes a stress factor for the little ones, it can also contribute to creating insomnia and addiction.
If we identify the symptoms mentioned in our children, in addition to helping them to know what is leading them to feel anxiety, supporting them and guiding them in their emotional management, it would be advisable to seek psychological care so that this process is more bearable and our child get help from professionals.