On June 1, 2023, I was in the Basic Training Course in Parenting Coordination, organized by the Family Assistance and Parenting Coordination Program, dependent on the Extension Secretariat of the Faculty of Legal and Social Sciences of the National University of The Silver. The dissertation was about Psychiatric and Psychological Intervention Techniques in family conflicts, given by Dr. Liliana Zanuso (Psychiatrist) and Lic. Lia Bikel (Psychologist).
At Espacio Sistémico they provide care for families in separation processes with a high level of conflict, through Parental Coordination. They provide support and accompaniment for children who are going through the difficult breakup of their parents, based on the order of a Judge.
For lawyers who intervene in legal relationship conflicts, it enriches us to access a different perspective of the situation, in particular, I highlight the reference that was made to the stages of divorce and that I share below:
The first stage is to think about the divorce. In the couple, in complete tranquility, one of them begins to think about separating, without sharing this information with whom they live.
The second stage is planning the divorce. The person who was thinking, raises the situation to the other, who did not even imagine it.
This explains the different times of people. It is not the same who was thinking of separating, than who receives the separation proposal.
The third stage consists of the implementation of the separation. Someone leaves home. It is a moment of great pain and requires family accompaniment. The decision, if there are children, must be communicated by both parents, jointly.
The fourth stage is the legal divorce, where lawyers intervene either to negotiate the conditions and/or to draft the agreements. This stage is where the blockage usually occurs in high-level conflicts. In these cases, it is recommended to request the judicial appointment of a Parental Coordinator.
The fifth stage is emotional divorce. It has been possible to resolve the duel with the other and each one can continue on their own.
Divorce is not reduced to presenting the lawsuit in court, the process begins before the intervention of the lawyer and ends after the sentence.
Knowing the process that takes place behind the divorce, allows us to understand that the impossibility of accessing the Legal Divorce is not the product of bad predisposition but of the need for time for the elaboration and conscious transit of the duel, whose duration is subjective and depends on each particular case.
*Divorce, refers to separation whether there is a marriage bond or not
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