Dianne (32): “I knock softly on the door of the attic room. “Breakfast is ready,” I say in English. ‘Are you coming?’ Normally my ten-year-old son and six-year-old daughter sleep upstairs, but since last night the Ukrainian Julia, her ten-year-old daughter Christina and the single 50-year-old Olga have been staying here.
It went so fast, I think as I pour tea. I was almost asleep when my husband lay down next to me a few days ago and told me with emotion about the images he saw on the news: a Ukrainian father saying goodbye to his family at the Polish border. “I saw you standing there with our children,” he said. “We have to do something, Daan. I think I’m going to drive to the Ukrainian border.’ Thomas is the impulsive one of us two. I am more rational. ‘Isn’t that illegal? Sleep on it one more night,” I muttered. But when we googled and called authorities the next day, I quickly agreed with Thomas. We have a big house, we are doing well financially… Why not do it?
Many questions
Although there is fresh bread on the table, the women first grab the food that has been in their backpacks for days. So humble, as if they don’t want to take advantage of the situation. Christina is glued to her mother and looks around warily. Julia and Olga are also quiet. They can speak a little English, but we mainly rely on the translation app. All I know about them is that they come from near Kyiv and spent three days on a crowded train that was regularly stopped due to bombing. What have they seen? Who did they have to leave behind? I have many questions, but don’t ask them. They must first relax, feel safe.
Towards Ukraine
We realized that this takes time when Thomas, his father, father-in-law, uncle, aunt, cousin and friend arrived at the Polish border after a long journey. They traveled in four cars to accommodate as many people as possible, but despite the large numbers of refugees it was not easy to fill the cars. Rumors abounded that people smugglers were active. I do understand it. Imagine that war breaks out here and there is a group of total stranger Spaniards at the German border. Will you get in then? In the end they drove back to the Netherlands with nine Ukrainians: three would come to us, the other six to my parents-in-law. While I was kept informed via Whatsapp, I got groceries, cleared the rooms and put down the camping fridge. So they have their own ‘floor’, I decided, because the bathroom and kitchen are shared with our family. It was nice to be involved with practical things, because I found it exciting. Who would be on the curb next?
News from Ukraine
After breakfast, Julia and Olga grab their phones. They follow the news from Ukraine closely, I can see the worries on their faces. I crawl behind the laptop with Thomas, procedures have to be started. Of course our guests can stay as long as necessary, but we prefer not to let it take six months. Not only for ourselves, they also need a place of their own.
At work, my colleagues are curious about how things are going at home. I tell them honestly that it is still getting used to. I have the feeling that I have visitors and I wonder how long it will take before I will sit on the couch unabashedly in my jogging suit. The children are also a bit irritable because of all the changes.
Time needed
When I come home at the end of the afternoon, my son Gijs and Christina jump together on the trampoline. They try to talk to each other via the translation app. Where the girl looked around timidly this morning, she now moves freely through the house. Julia and Olga, on the other hand, often withdraw to their rooms. Yes, this takes time. I hope they will realize that we really only do this out of love.”