During the daily demonstrations in the center of Paramaribo I develop a new play, together with a Surinamese theater maker. She comes into the rehearsal room one morning and says, “I’m not going to perform when there’s a demonstration. My people are hungry. You and I are hungry Nina. But these people are hungry. How am I going to play cozy theater in a protected setting, while my friends any time can be knocked down by the mobile unit…’
I see theater plays as my only way of demonstrating against inequality. By making my own experience visible. I think that’s all I can do as an actor. I see the personal, deeply lived, honest, inconsistent personal experience as the starting point for a broader human perspective. So, when she plays a play with me about our differences in culture and perspective, it’s all about me and about the shit that’s going on in this country: about inequality, about privilege, about prejudice – all the hot things those demonstrations are about. now go. I explain this, in the kitchen of the rehearsal room. She looks at me and sighs.
Then she says calmly, almost lovingly, “I totally disagree with you. Your vision is European.’
I don’t understand what she means by that.
She continues to emphasize the we-culture that prevails in Suriname versus the I-culture that prevails in Europe. The loyalty she’s talking about, to the point of not playing the show, I can’t imagine.
And so we cannot understand each other. And that’s okay. We continue to sit at the table together every day and continue to exchange our most intimate thoughts. We disagree 100 percent, but we trust each other completely.
We constantly feel misunderstood, all day long, in every conversation. Yet we continue to sit at that table and look each other in the eye. Yet we continue to have this conversation. Not bitter. But playful. We laugh, we eat together. We share stories. We listen to each other’s music. We cry together. We don’t understand, we don’t understand. And yet here we are.
We both take each other’s misunderstanding calmly. That someone disagrees with you is no reason to panic. I find that pleasant. Explain to me how we are different. Explain to me your part. Even though I don’t understand it. Teach me to know myself, through my own misunderstanding.
During lunch we toast with a piece of roti plate (roti pancake), which we first dip deeply in the delicious sauce. The two roti pieces touch each other and she says:
‘To our collaboration. To our friendship. On the gulf of difference between us.’
Nina de la Parra lives and works in Suriname this summer.