Seat problems take all the fun out of cycling – here’s how to prevent them

Sporty cycling is wonderful and less prone to injury than running, or football and other contact sports. But every cyclist has one tricky point of contact: the seat. Sometimes, with some often, there is a dead feeling, or a strange tingling, or a scrape, or a hair follicle infection, or a boil. Or, in the long run, a big bump. Cyclists protect themselves against this with seat ointment, with good cycling shorts and with a suitable and well-adjusted saddle.

Saddles and trousers have changed dramatically in recent years. And the different brands of seat ointments differ enormously in composition. On what basis is that? There is no thorough research in scientific journals about how often buttock problems occur in cyclists and what can be done about it, the conclusion of a review article that appeared earlier this year. It contains a long list of research still to be carried out. What is known: of the cyclists in Dutch and Belgian amateur cycling clubs, about half have regular seat problems that last a day or longer. This varies from swelling behind the scrotum or of the labia, to abrasions, urination problems or inflammation. There are no more precise conclusions, because the research was conducted rather poorly methodologically.

Long bike rides lead to more problems – you read that kind of open-door conclusions. Professional cyclists, with a very experienced seat and cycling position, also regularly struggle with saddle pain. Sometimes even serious. But then again, they drive more than ten times as many kilometers as we, ordinary sports, holiday or commuter cyclists.

The innovations also tumble over each other for the non-pro. Large webshops for cycling equipment, such as Futurumshop, 12gobiking and Mantel, have selection aids for saddles and cycling shorts. Information about seat problems can be found on the sites of cycling magazines. And in good bike shops, the sellers don’t laugh about it, but they’ll grab a good pair of cycling shorts and let you try saddles until you’re satisfied.

Cyclists with serious buttocks problems, or an overprotective nature, see a doctor. It concerns inflammation, but also often a thickening on the perineum, the area between anus and genitals. Men often refer to it as their ‘third ball’. And that’s what the bulge looks like: the skin is normal, but underneath is a round bulge. Not as clearly defined as a testicle, but still distinctly distinct. Such a permanent swelling is not reserved for men. Women also take it to the doctor. With swellings that are next to, behind, or on the labia.

I consider my third ball to be my seat. But the shock strikes when you read how doctors write about it in medical scientific journals. There, that bulge is unabashedly described as a pseudo-tumor. There are doctors who want to remove some tissue from it to see if the tissue that is growing is benign. An overgrowth of subcutaneous connective tissue, and lymph tissue and sometimes some other tissue types is then found, but in fact always benign. There are (fortunately) ‘patients’ who refuse such a puncture. After all, the chance of a malignant tumor at that location is many times smaller for cyclists than the chance of extra seat meat. But there were also cyclists who went along with the medical fear of bumps and had their third ball cut away. With the risk, for which it is again warned, that the resulting scar tissue can continue to irritate for days after cycling.

Usually, for all buttock problems, self-help, getting sick, prevention and purchasing good material is the best solution. You can prevent this by washing the cycling clothing after every trip. Some people shave their pubic hair away from there. Ointment helps against abrasions. Zinc ointment fights inflammation. And temporarily cycling fewer kilometers – not fun, but it does help.

Then the material.

Ointment

Broekenvet is the clear, but outdated name for seat ointment; the jars and tubes with seat creams now mainly contain chamois cream. The chamois is the classy name for the chamois in the cycling shorts, which no longer consists of a piece of bare goatskin that sports and holiday cyclists used to cycle on thirty years ago.

It is unknown how many cyclists smear before boarding. Half is a calculated guess based on some science and asking around. Many cyclists swear it helps them. But what exactly helps?

The cream manufacturers don’t know. That is the conclusion from the comparison of the ingredient lists of different brands of cream. Yes, the ointments are greasy and slippery and contain components that do and do not absorb into the skin. An ingredient list always starts (legally) with the ingredient that is most in it, descending to the least used ingredient. And those lists always start with water. After that there is variation. Vaseline-like substances, fats and oils, waxes, fatty acids, emulsifiers, preservatives, fragrances and even siloxanes, super lubricants consisting of silicon and oxygen atoms, are in it.

Many cyclists simply take petroleum jelly, lanolin, udder ointment or zinc ointment. Pure Vaseline is often not recommended, because it is difficult to wash out of the pants. Zinc ointment contains the anti-inflammatory zinc oxide, which is really only needed to prevent or fight inflammation. When making your choice, keep in mind that the prices vary from 5 to 25 euros for a 200 ml jar. Feel free to start cheap and try, because there is no guarantee that expensive is better or more pleasant. And, as mentioned, about half of the cyclists do not use grease. If you have been using the habit for years, you might want to try to stop.

The trouser manufacturers like their chamois so much that they don’t think lubrication is really necessary.

cycling shorts

The following applies to cycling shorts: expensive is better. To a certain extent. The optimum is around 150 euros. For that money you can buy pants from a well-known brand (AGU, Castelli, Craft, Endura, Assos, Santini for example) in which the best chamois of that brand is sewn. And the trouser fabric stretches well and is nice and tight. This is necessary to keep the chamois properly in place.

The modern chamois is made up of pieces of foam of different thickness and different compressibility. The foam is almost always made of polyurethane. Yes, kitchen sponges are also made from that, but polyurethane is a polymer whose long chains are made from two different basic molecules. And during production, bubble-forming substances are added, which can also vary. The chamois manufacturers use this foam in different places in the chamois. Take a look at the video about chamois manufacturing by the Italian chamois maker Elastic Interface on YouTube. It is advertising, but insightful advertising.

The sit bones, parts of the hip bone, with which you sit on the saddle, receive the thickest foam support. The perineum and the external genitals are relieved and receive support from thinner and softer foam. The chamois for women differ from those for men, partly because the sit bones in women are on average further apart than in men.

Saddle

These sit bones are the starting point for choosing a suitable saddle. The distance between the two sitting bones will determine the width of the saddle. Good saddles are designed separately for women (wider) and men (longer) and come in two or three widths. The seat bone width is easy to measure yourself. Take a piece of corrugated cardboard the size of the seat. Put that on a stool, or other hard flat surface, and sit on it. Slightly or further bent over, as you are on your bike. After a few minutes you get up. Look around and see the two dimples in the cardboard. Place a dot in the center of each dimple and measure the distance between the dots. That is the distance between your sit bones. That distance decreases a bit as you lean further forward.

For good saddle advice, from a bicycle repair shop or online store, after sitting bone width and gender, there are still questions about whether you wobble back and forth with each pedal stroke. Or sit still. And whether you sit ‘deep’ or upright. Then the choice is quickly limited to a few saddles. Often from different brands. Prices range from about 50 to over 250 euros. The difference is in the materials used. They determine the weight of the saddle and whether it will last. Think twice before choosing a super light and rock hard saddle, the choice websites often warn. That is more something for gram-chasing competition cyclists. But if you make a lot of kilometers, a thickly filled gel saddle is out of the question. The sit bones sink into this, creating pressure on the perineum again. And the sweat can’t go away. Resulting in nerve compression and abrasions.

Modern sport bike saddles nowadays almost all have a slot, or an elongated hole in the middle. You won’t believe it at first, but those saddles are very comfortable.

Only buy from stores where you can try the saddle for a month and exchange it without hesitation. The customer-friendly, expert bicycle shop owner does the same.

Meanwhile, the world is commercializing the cyclist’s seat. There are companies that measure your cycling position with beautiful computerized equipment and then take care of the bicycle, saddle and cycling shoe adjustment. This can be useful for those who have complaints and who want to hear from someone else what the best bicycle setting would be, based on measured data from often thousands of other cyclists. But it costs a lot of money. Most cyclists can usually relieve their own seat sufficiently with simple saddle selection menus, an expert shopkeeper, a piece of corrugated cardboard and perhaps an ointment.