Parents are allowed to go back into school: for some a relief, for others a burden

A mother says goodbye to her daughter in the hallway of De Klimroos. In the nursery classes, parents are allowed to enter the school again, but not yet into the classroom.Image Raymond Rutting / de Volkskrant

‘Good morning! Glad you can go back in, isn’t it!’ At the entrance of the nursery class of public primary school De Klimroos in Utrecht, a radiant teacher Marianne Delfgaauw watches as the children trickle in hand in hand with their parents.

Now that the corona measures have been relaxed, parents are allowed to go back to school for the first time since the early Christmas holidays, which leads to pleasant chats at the door – about the storm, for example. A father quickly approaches the teacher: his child has just been vaccinated and may experience some inconvenience. ‘Good to know’, Delfgaauw responds understandingly.

She has missed contact with the parents, she says. Lately, parents have dropped off their children at the side entrance. Then it was often a bit of shouting across the square. Like: he’s had an accident, he’s a little sad. Then you miss a lot of little things.’

Back to normal

The fact that schools are again accessible to parents is part of the relaxation package that Health Minister Ernst Kuipers announced last Tuesday. Reading aloud, parent discussions in the school, taking a look at the classroom: it’s all possible again. Although this week with a mouth cap on and 1,5 meters away from each other, but starting next Friday that is no longer necessary.

However, not all schools automatically switch back to the old. Some are using the corona experiment to implement lasting changes. Last year, for example, a poll by the General Association of School Leaders showed that 20 percent of schools have switched to the ‘much quieter’ continuous schedule since the corona crisis, in which the children stay at school for lunch at noon.

At a number of secondary schools, the ‘VIP tours’ for limited groups of students and parents were so popular because of the personal attention that they stayed. Keeping the parents out also turned out to be such a relief for some schools that this has become a permanent policy. lice mother-like scenes, such as the eternal waving in front of the window or parents who uninvitedly throw themselves on a teacher to complain about an unhealthy treat, are thus prevented.

‘Parents often continue to talk in class or stick in the hall, while we really want to start teaching at half past eight’, says Lenie Renne, teaching assistant at Het Rondeel primary school in Den Bosch. ‘It is also quieter for children. Normally it is: here mommy, my coat and bag. Now they arrange this themselves.’

Structure

But what is the child actually better off with? The toddlers of primary school De Klimroos find this a difficult question. “I like that Dad can come again,” says a 5-year-old boy. Why? He shrugs. ‘Ordinary.’

It probably doesn’t matter much to the children, says Yolanda Klomp, who works in education as a remedial educationalist. ‘Although this is of course a different story with vulnerable children.’ In general, Klomp continues, children are perfectly capable of going in alone, as long as this has been clearly discussed with them. ‘Structure is very important.’

For parents, on the other hand, it can be quite difficult to leave their child in the schoolyard. ‘They want to help their children as much as possible out of their own concern. By letting go, they give their child a sense of responsibility and therefore self-confidence. The school can guide parents in this.’

Child and youth psychiatrist Rianne Klaassen points to the risk that the gap between parents and schools will become too large, so that worrying signals are not picked up. ‘How parents say goodbye to students can say a lot about the home situation’, she says.

According to Klaassen, the interests of children, parents and teachers must be weighed up against each other as well as possible. Age is an important factor in this. ‘Then you can say: toddlers are brought in by parents and from the age of 6 the child has to go in himself, but in that case ensure a fixed contact moment with all parents, so that attention is not only focused on cheeky parents who do this before. claim their child.’

Intermediate form

Many schools have postponed the decision whether or not to admit parents until after spring break. There are also schools that have opted for an intermediate form: parents are allowed to enter the school a few days a week and drop their children outside on the other days. Other schools ask parents to sign in the agenda when they want to go to class with their child.

For Joeri Baartscheer, director of primary school De Klimroos, it was clear from the start that parents were allowed back inside as soon as this would be allowed again. ‘Experiencing school together is extremely important for the motivation of the children and the feeling of safety’, he thinks.

De Klimroos is a school with students from various backgrounds. ‘Some parents don’t read the newsletter. Now we can address them directly, which is much nicer than sending an email.’

Parents are happy with that decision. ‘Of course it was useful to quickly drop off your child in front of the door,’ says mother Dilek Atabay. ‘But I find it much more pleasant to be allowed back in, also because of the contact you have with other parents.’

Father Rik (‘prefer not to have a last name’) especially likes to catch a glimpse of what his son is doing. He went to school for the first time during the corona crisis. Then your child suddenly experiences all kinds of adventures, such as Sinterklaas, Christmas and the Easter celebration, but as a parent you don’t get much of that. I missed that.’

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