Mathias Sercu provides update on sick son Tore: “He is unexpectedly doing well at the moment” | Instagram HLN

Tore is actually battling a double cancer. “But at the moment there is nothing active on the two fronts: not in his bones and not in his central nervous system,” Sercu said. “We would not have thought that two months ago. Although we also have to be realistic: there is no hope for a cure.” He has always spoken openly about the difficult time his family is going through. “What else am I supposed to talk about? It’s who I am right now. It’s our life, why shouldn’t we talk about it?”

“For me personally, talking about it also helps,” continues the actor, who can currently be seen in ‘Chantal’. “Shared suffering is half suffering, and we were raised that way: we talk about almost everything. For example, I also have a brother who is a nurse on a palliative care unit. Death is not a taboo for us. It helps a lot that we talk about it and that we can laugh about it too. Humor is so important. It’s sometimes black humor, but it’s not all doom and gloom either.”

Sercu had a hard time after a fragment in which Tore openly talks about his imminent end. “It’s hard to hear him say that. In terms of maturity, I was simply passed over by my son. I am not afraid of death, but I am afraid of his death. You don’t want your child to be in pain and sadness, but we are in it, in that situation. So there’s no point in pretending.”

Mathias had brought his brother Sam to the studio. He too has been battling cancer for almost ten years. “The original diagnosis was bad: they barely gave me 16 months. So I’ve been living in ‘extra time’ for 8.5 years now.” The two brothers performed the song ‘A beautiful day’ together, for the benefit of ‘Art at bed’, a project by ‘Top Doctor’ Tessa Kerre – she is Tore’s accompanying doctor. With this they want to make topics such as cancer and death more open for discussion. “Death is just part of life. We are all a bit untrained to deal with saying goodbye, but everyone goes through it. My son says, “I’ve had a beautiful life.” Whenever it stops, his life is complete. Whether you’ve lived 20 years or 80 years, it’s all just a fart in a bottle after all. So: ‘What a beautiful day.’”

On Sunday morning, Tore was also a guest on ‘Touché’, on Radio 1. “The diagnosis has put an abrupt end to all ideas about my future”, he said there. He also talked about his girlfriend Frauke, with whom he has been together for more than a year. He was forced to cancel their first date because he was transferred from AZ Sint-Lucas to UZ Gent that evening. The two now also live together. “It’s the perfect final destination for me,” said Tore. “I’m great in that house, with Frauke and our cat.”

Despite Tore’s illness, everything feels perfect. But the two realize their relationship is short-lived. “Frauke is the one who has to deal with I who will disappear and she who has to move on. That seems terrible to me,” he said. “She says she’s not really working on that yet, because she doesn’t know what it will be like either. We try to work on our relationship step by step, without big plans for the future. I want to give her a lot of time and love, and that gives me a lot of peace. She has become a foundation for me.”

Tore also has a lot of support from his family. While he was in hospital, the Sercu family camped in a motor home in the parking lot. “That has done so much more than I realized. I could go outside, sit with them and play board games, in a different environment for a while. My parents created so much warmth in my head.”

Tore Sercu’s sister also got married early so that he could be there. “Everything is adapted for the poor cancer patient, but actually it is not about me at that moment and that is very frustrating when it suddenly seems to be about me.” In any case, the illness brought the Sercu family even closer together. “Especially in the way of talking and sharing pain. Everyone feels a different pain and they have to keep going in society, but we talk a lot about the positive and the negative things. It also feels good to be together. We also share very quickly, if that makes us happy.”

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