Just when she thinks about going on holiday, 35-year-old Marjolein Paijmans from Loon op Zand gets Spanish. Marjolein suffers so much from homesickness that a long holiday is not in it. Just a weekend away. “I still want my 2.5-year-old son Ravi to discover the world,” says Marjolein.
Marjolein can only remember that she is homesick. “We went to the same campsite with our family for eighteen years during our holiday: camping Gorishoek in Stavenisse in Zeeland. That felt like a home base for me and that went quite well. But if an activity such as canoeing was held at sea, for example I didn’t join. Then it was the end of the story.”
“If I know I’m going somewhere, my body plays up.”
That used to be the case, but the homesickness still plays a major role in Marjolein’s life. “When I know I’m going somewhere, for example a day out, my body plays up. I can barely eat and drink. I get hot and cold, as if my body wants to stop me from doing anything further. I have struggling to get out and stay away.”
Marjolein says that she has tried everything to get rid of her homesickness. “Paracetamol, ibuprofen, soothing tea, a special bracelet, rubbing in an ointment and all the other tricks I found on Google.”
“I can enjoy other people’s vacation photos.”
A doctor prescribed oxazepam. “That helped a bit, but as soon as it wore off the feeling of homesickness came back. Then I got emotional and I literally ran out of the situation.”
“I never go on holiday. I can enjoy other people’s holiday photos on Facebook or if I get a magnet for the fridge,” says Marjolein. “Am I wrong? I don’t know what it’s like to go on holiday abroad. Every now and then I go to an autocross with acquaintances for a weekend. Then I drive my own car and I am with acquaintances. In that situation I’ll be fine.”
“Sometimes I feel trapped in my body.”
In a few weeks she will put on her naughty shoes and she wants to go to a campsite in Zeeland for a week with her son Ravi. “I’ve been to that campsite before and there’s a friend with her family. They help me through the week and can calm me down if necessary. I don’t want to deprive Ravi of the holiday.”
Marjolein hopes that the feeling of homesickness will disappear with the years. “I have been told that. I notice that the upcoming holiday is already affecting me. Instead of three, I now eat two sandwiches. I sleep worse. My body wants to stop me. Sometimes I feel trapped in my body.” Still, she wants to continue the holiday. “Ravi must also be able to discover the world.”
“My brother in Sweden really wants us to go that way.”
In daily life, Marjolein works in a residential group with demented elderly people in Waalwijk. “It’s my second home. I’ve been working there for ten years. Colleagues noticed that I never went on holiday. I could always work when someone was sick. But they didn’t see homesickness coming.”
Recently her brother emigrated to Sweden. “He really wants us to come that way. He will then have to pick us up, take us and bring us back. Otherwise we will never get to Sweden. That is too big a step with my homesickness, say a disaster scenario.”
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