Jan Müller’s “Reflector” column, episode 13: How the doctors developed into Dadaesque master poets

In 1984 I was a tiny thirteen year old kid. Nevertheless, I already owned a few punk records and cassettes. Among them Slime, OHL, GBH or the wonderful Hamburg sampler WATERKANT-HITS with bands like Knallschoten, Oxenschwanz, Channel Rats, HH Milch and Massaker. In that same year I came across a very idiosyncratic Berlin compilation LP: EIN VOLRAUSCH IN STEREO * 20 FOAMING MOOD HITS.

I loved the approach of this album. The often all too dogged gesture of the punk scene of the time was undermined here in many ways. About by the German drinking youth. With their band concept, to unconditionally pay homage to alcohol and only write drinking songs and also to live this declaration of loyalty, this band then unfortunately ruined itself pretty soon. Ms. Suuhrbier, on the other hand, played an idiosyncratic Schlager Rock-A-Billy.

The enthusiasm that in punk you can really cast any topic in song form

And Die Ärzte was also difficult for me to classify with their three great songs “Zum Bäcker”, “Vollmilch” and “Zitroneneis” contained on the LP. They confirmed my enthusiasm that in punk you can pour any topic into song form. When I told my schoolmate Hans about my doctor’s discovery, he replied, somewhat contemptuously, that this band was sufficiently well-known from “Bravo”. Unlike me, Hans read this terrifying sheet. Nevertheless, he handed me a cassette a little later: On side A there was Die Ärzte with the mini LP UNS GEHT’S PRIMA and the DEBIL LP; on the B-side, however, the Angry Samoans and the Dead Kennedys from the USA roar. BASF C-90 Chromium Dioxide.

I’ve heard both sides take turns countless times. However, I didn’t publicize my passion for Die Ärzte, because they were mainstream in my little underground and fanzine world, so they had to be found secretly. Luckily, I eventually got confident enough to stop being sneaky. Soon it was the band’s more serious songs rather than the silly hits that got my attention. After all, I managed to do it with friends during a camping holiday on Sylt in the late 80s, due to an extremely bad lovesickness, after massive consumption of green banana liqueur and while repeatedly playing the song “Wie on the first day” by the third doctor albums to puke against our tent. Much to the annoyance of my fellow travelers.

Actually all Die-Ärzte albums after the re-foundation are an eclectic mixture

A while ago, a friend whose taste in music is untouchable told me that once, in the pre-streaming days, he developed such a craving for that very song that he stormed out of the house to buy the Doctors album, the contains this song. I can understand this desire well. In 1993, the year of the re-establishment of the doctors and the founding of my own band Tocotronic, I once again found myself in circles where it was not well liked to like the doctors. But I didn’t care. Of course I bought her new album.

I have followed their development over the years with much sympathy. They created various love songs that were equal to the song “Wie on the first day”. But they also opened up in various directions, so that actually all of the Ärzte albums after the re-foundation are an eclectic mixture. Since “Schrei nach Liebe” there have always been committed songs. On the album DUNKEL there is even a thoroughly reasonable plea for democracy.

From hilarious couplet-like songs to grandiose self-incriminations to Dada-esque masterpieces

But the sense of humor has also improved over the years. Little by little, the dubious tastelessness of the “Elke” caliber disappeared. Their wit now ranges from hilarious couplet-like songs (“Die Allerschürfste”) to grandiose self-incriminations (“Goldenes Handwerk”) and Dada-esque masterpieces (“Rock’n’Roll-Übermensch”). And to bring one last example: The song “I am the beach” recently caught me so much in its factual sadness that tears ran down my face. What has to be mentioned at the end: The doctors have found a permanent bass player since their re-establishment. I was very happy. Because I already knew Rod Gonzales from the WATERKANT-HITS sampler as a member of the band Massaker. The circle was closed. I’m glad The Doctors are back. May they stay with us for a long time.

Regarding Jan Müller’s “Reflector” podcast: www.viertausendhertz.de/reflektor

This column first appeared in the Musikexpress issue 03/2022.

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