Changing the paradigm in the way of seeing the Law implies, among other things, placing special emphasis on the possibility of taking conflict as an opportunity and not as a negative fact.
Without falling into utopian optimism, the reality is that the moment in which a conflict is addressed turns out to be decisive in generating in people a positive or negative assessment in relation to what happens to them.
When the parties involved have already been confronted in a dispute, it is very difficult to work in search of a space that allows generating a reversal in the dynamics that the conflict has caused.
The courts are the perfect setting for the confrontational game to acquire its best form of expression, bringing with it emotional exhaustion, uncertainty regarding the result, an effort to win and a deep sense of loss.
If we want to change our perspective in relation to conflicts, it is necessary, in principle, to assume that they are inevitable in life in society.
It is impossible to live without conflicts.
To think of a life without conflict is to deny the human essence, the one that leads us to even have intrapersonal conflicts.
Understanding that we are rational and emotional beings, with permanent contradictions, subject to a series of mandates that have imposed on us a univocal way of thinking about the world and thinking about ourselves, leads us to assume that, in order to evolve and link ourselves with the authentic realization of our desires, Inevitably, we are going to have to go through a succession of conflicts with what brought us here and made us who we are.
Only if we understand that point and can, consequently, recognize our own conflict as something natural, that simply requires adequate management, will we be in a position to assume that, inevitably, we will have conflicts with others and that such dissent is healthy as long as It shows that no one is being subjected to the way they think, say or act.
Changing the way we think about conflicts challenges us to find the appropriate way to remove the halo of negativity from them, to dissociate them from the destructive burden that links them to a problematic situation in which, inevitably, there is a culprit and a victim, a winner and a loser, one part that will be right and another that will not be right.
Consequently, to bring about a real change in the approach to legal conflicts, it is necessary to learn how to manage them. This implies, on the one hand, accepting dissent and, on the other, understanding that the Law will be able to resolve, more or less effectively, only the normative part of the matter, that is, the rational aspect.
Only if we are able to generate a context to manage the conflict will we be able to resolve it both in its rational and emotional aspects, incorporating resources that allow us to carry out an all-encompassing approach to the normative framework and the emotions at play. This mechanic will bring us closer to the possibility of reestablishing communication between the parties so that they can then restore the trust that the conflict has broken.
The only way to ensure that the dissenting parties can experience the conflict situation as something inherent to life in society, which does not have to have a negative connotation and which can represent the opportunity to create a better scenario, is to intervene in the first phase of the conflict, using appropriate methods to manage it, so that the parties feel that they have reasonably achieved an approach to their objectives.
The recognition of this point has begun its journey with the incorporation of mediation as a mandatory prior approach prior to the judicial instance, with the aim of an impartial third party trying to bring the parties together and reach an agreement that puts an end to the dispute.
Both mediation and conciliation have been framed within conflict resolution techniques, that is, both represent an instance in which a space for negotiation is opened that allows circumscribing the scope of the conflict and restoring communication between the parties. having as its goal the arrival of an understanding.
However, the challenge is to move forward in the search for new alternatives that allow for the management of the emotions at stake.
Talking about management implies assuming that there may be a part of the conflict that is not going to be solved, that will require learning resources that allow one to live with a certain degree of discomfort and endure it without this implying entering a zone of tension.
Each conflict contains not only a clash of interests, but also a perception by the parties involved who observe it as a situation that affects them negatively, generating, consequently, a series of feelings and emotions that are also part of the dispute.
Both the perception of the problem and the feelings that it provokes in each of the parties are essential when managing a conflict, since they will indicate the scope of the conflict and give us guidelines for the type of results that could resolve it.
Emotions will be what will determine the scope of the size of the problem; Thus, the same conflict, in terms of a specific fact, perceived with highly negative emotions, will be more difficult to solve given that there will be a greater number of negative interpretations, anger and lack of trust towards the other party and, even, disbelief in the possibility of find a solution; On the contrary, the same fact, viewed with positive emotions, will generate a broader vision of the situation and facilitate the possibility of finding creative alternatives that allow the solution of the problem.
This first approach to conflict implies taking into account the role that emotions and emotional states play in their own structure, which challenges us to offer resources to carry out adequate management of this emotional aspect.
On many occasions, people do not know how to connect with their own emotionality; In others, they do not know how to express what they feel, in many cases they are afraid to show their feelings and in many others, they feel ashamed to do so.
Thus, accompanying people involved in a conflict so that they can manage it by exposing the emotions that underlie the position they hold, gives us the wonderful opportunity to minimize the negative factors that influence the perception of the matter and encourage the participants. to reach an agreement that allows them to obtain mutual benefits and encourages them to feel that they were able to get something positive out of a problematic situation.
Understanding that every conflict brings with it the opportunity to build a solution is starting the path towards peace.
by CEDOC