More than half of the Dutch indicate that they have not talked enough about death with someone who has since passed away. This is apparent from research by SIRE, a foundation that makes advertising campaigns about social themes. The current campaign focuses on encouraging people to talk more about death.
The SIRE initiative has the slogan ‘Death. Talk about it. Not over it’. “Whether it concerns talking to your loved ones about death or having a conversation with people who are grieving. Talking about it improves the quality of life,” the foundation believes. Three TV spots will be broadcast in the near future to reinforce this message. These include, among other things, the discomfort that comes with mentioning death. SIRE’s research shows that more than a third of the Dutch find it uncomfortable to talk about it.
Pulmonologist and specialist Sander de Hosson of the Wilhelmina Hospital Assen (WZA) is also convinced of the importance of talking about death. “Death is a given, but let’s talk about that part before it. Hold each other tightly as a family, create space to say goodbye. take the time to look back. That not only helps the dying, but also the relatives in the grieving process. Not talking about it makes everything even rawer.”
According to De Hosson, advances in medical science make everything in life seem feasible. Doctors speak too little about death, because the focus is on ‘making better’. But according to the doctor, these conversations must be held.
“Talking about death can lead to insights and gives peace of mind. I notice that in my work. Many people are afraid of suffocation when they die, for example. But by talking to them, I can tell them that this doesn’t happen often.”
About seventy percent of people want to die at home. Ultimately, only thirty percent of this wish is fulfilled. “On the one hand, this is because the phase towards death is often erratic,” says De Hosson. “What we also see is a shortage of staff in home care. Last weekend I saw a patient who wanted to die at home, but there were no staff. That was very sad. That is why I think it is so important that attention is paid to palliative care. take care and say goodbye.”