What can you do against bullying? Here’s what you need to know

taketonews

Bullying and teasing are sometimes confused. But where teasing is playful and temporary, bullying lingers: it is deliberately hurtful, happens again and again and there is a power differential, with the victim as the weaker party. Bullying leaves many people traumatized.

Enough reason to delve deeper into the subject. In this guide we collect all relevant articles about bullying NRC published in recent years, about the who, what, where and why of bullying.

1 How does bullying work?

  • Why do children bully? In this article we answer the most important questions about bullying.
  • Girls exhibit antisocial behavior less often. But when they do, it’s intense. How does the psychology of aggressive girls work?
  • Spreading mean gossip at school: that’s always been the case. With the arrival of Gossip Girl channels on TikTok However, things are getting out of hand. School directors are at a loss.
  • Not only children are victims of bullying. How many people are actually bullied every year?? The Central Bureau of Statistics (CBS) collected the most important bullying figures (among Dutch people over the age of 15) for 2021.

Also read: Bullying has a huge impact on its victims. In this special investigates NRC what bullying does to you.

2 What is it like to be bullied?

  • Editor Saskia van Loenen was bullied in high school by a boy from her street. She was not safe at school either. She wrote here how that affected her, and how she views it now. “The neighborhood became a horrible place. Thanks to that monster from my street.”
  • Also a former professional cyclist and NRC columnist Marijn de Vries has experience with bullying. In an impressive column she wrote, among other things: “I was ‘just’ bullied, and I am still learning from this: the behavior of others mainly says something about them. Not about you.”
  • Interviews with a bullied boy (now adult) and a former bully: “We took her coat away. We then threw them to other children. If you hit someone with that, you shouted: ‘Haha, now you have lice too.’ Ilona is crying, of course, and we are laughing.”
  • When we think of trauma, we often think of war zones and veterans, but… the definition of trauma is becoming increasingly broader. A history of plague is now also often mentioned. Why is that?
  • What if your child has been bullied in the past and is still bothered by it? A mother wonders if she did the right thing at the time. Tell your child often that they can be who they are, say parenting experts.
  • Bullying at workBullying isn’t just about children, it also happens among adults, for example in the workplace. Even then it can have major consequences.
  • According to research, about 23 percent of all workers are bullied at some point. Also cyberbullying is common among adults – for example, excluding colleagues by not forwarding emails or not communicating appointments.
  • When is something actually bullying in the workplace? In a factory environment it is often immediately noticeable, but… in the office it remains subtle.

Illustration Frann de Bruin

3 What can we do to prevent bullying?

  • The children’s ombudsman proposed that in 2021 bullying should be criminalized. Is that feasible and desirable?
  • It’s possible: children learning through play to be more patient and to lash out at peers less often. This VR game seems to help children with short fuses.
  • ‘Just’ bullying by girls is common more subtle than when boys do it. With the ‘Girl venom’ teaching package, schools are trying to tackle bullying among girls.
  • What should you do if your child is left out by a bully? An open conversation with parents can often be difficult.
  • Just as it works with children, it works with adult bullies a reward often better than punishment. “If the children play well together, they all get a piece of candy. That is an ancient principle that should be used more often.”
  • What are the very best films and books about bullying? NRC collected the best tips that all children should have seen and read.

ttn-32