Talk to your child about the war in Israel: ‘Ask what they have already seen and whether it shocked them’ | Healthy

“We notice that parents have a lot of questions. For example, because their children see intense images on social media or on television. It is important that children know that they can contact their parents with questions. And if this is not possible, children can also call the Children’s Telephone.”

“Look at what your child needs, not at what you think is important. Control your urge to pour everything you know about the war onto your child. Listen to the question and answer it. Then wait a moment, another question may come up.

Also be aware of your own feelings. Children sense a lot and will be less likely to talk about it if they notice that you are anxious yourself. Share your concerns with your partner or friends first before talking to your child. Don’t silence the subject, but keep asking your child about it: not six times a day, but regularly. Watch the Youth News together and discuss what you saw. Ask how that feels and what he or she thinks about it. Distract your child and yourself in time. Don’t let him or her go to bed with the war, but read aloud or play a game before going to sleep.”

“Assume that your children are not concerned with the war in Israel. Or that it is bad when they see misery. As a parent you are inclined to keep trouble away from your children. But they see it via Tik Tok or other social media and more than you think. Images of war can be intense. You can’t protect them from reality, but by talking to them about it you make them feel safe. Playing down the situation is also not helpful. Don’t say: ‘It’s not so bad’. You just can’t promise that everything will turn out fine.”

“Especially if they don’t bring it up themselves, it can be a good thing to ask. Check what they already know but keep it simple. For example, ask: “What have you heard about Israel and Palestine?” “Do you know what’s going on?” “Who did you talk about it with?” Also ask what they have already seen. And whether they are shocked by it. Say: ‘War is bad, the whole world thinks so. We are working hard to ensure that it stops.’ You can reassure a child who is afraid that a bomb will fall on your house; that doesn’t happen.”

“Fear is part of everyday life. Being afraid of spiders or monsters under the bed is normal. But if a child is hampered in daily functioning, has nightmares, continues to complain of stomach ache or has difficulty concentrating, you should seek help. Contact the school and discuss your concerns, talk to your doctor, or visit a parenting center.”