Toxicity or emotional evasion? The limit that we do not want to look …
We live in an era that celebrates self -love, self -care and limits. This evolution, necessary and healthy, brought more awareness about what we deserve in a relationship. But it also brought a risk: starting to call “toxic” to everything that bothers us or unleashed us emotionally.
The toxic word * today is used as an emotional wild card. It applies to describe people, relationships, attitudes or even internal sensations that we do not know how to name otherwise. It went viral, accessible, almost automatic. And without realizing it, we began to discard links that perhaps were not harmful, but challenging.
True love is not always comfortable. It faces us with our own wounds, activates our insecurities and forces us to review patterns that often come from afar. But instead of looking inward, it is easier to put a sign to the other and run from the scene.
In many cases, what is considered “toxic” is, in reality, an unresolved dynamic between two people. It is not that someone is “toxic by nature”, but that the link that is generated between both parties activates wounds, fears or defense mechanisms that, without conscience, are repeated and climb, expresses María Stella.
We confuse intensity with toxicity.
We associate discomfort with danger.
We cancel the other instead of talking.
Does that mean that we must tolerate everything? Of course not.
There are situations in which cutting the bond is a vital necessity: when there is manipulation, violence, devaluation or loss of identity. In those cases, moving away is a healthy and brave decision.
But not everything that hurts hurts.
Not everything that bothers is destructive.
And not everything challenging is a threat.
In many cases, what bothers is precisely what we need to see to grow.
Final reflection
Emotionally mature implies -to use labels to start asking us questions.
Is this really toxic or simply challenges me?
Am I fleeing from the other or myself?
Conscious love is not perfect, but it is brave. It is encouraged to look, to speak, to stay when it is worth it already when it is necessary.
It does not seek guilty: ** Assume responsibilities **.
Because deep down, it is not about toxic relationships … these are people who still did not learn to link from consciousness.
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