So Musk is going to marry Italian Giorgia Meloni this year. A Swiss bank has predicted this. I hope in an open Tesla, Donald as best man and a honeymoon to Mars. I’m still recovering a bit lamely from our national New Year’s Eve damage: two deaths, 23 eyes, a pair of hands, dozens of fingers and also a few loose thumbs. Most victims are under the age of eighteen. That will be difficult gaming.
I myself lost my soon to be banned diesel on New Year’s Eve. A clean diesel, that is. Thirteen years old and 450,000 kilometers on the odometer. Due to my financial laxity, he still had comprehensive insurance. I parked him in the center of Culemborg and the drunk youth cremated him festively. Next week I will receive the current value in my account.
For a moment I was afraid that diesel would not work well. That is true, but the partying crowd made it very professionally impossible for the fire brigade to extinguish the fire. Pavement tiles, cobras, flower boxes and avalanche arrows went their way. And never say that drunk people can’t aim. Everything was spot on. And a good shot too. Two ambulances arrived for the few injured firefighters, but they were also pelted profusely. The ambulance crew sat bleeding on the cold paving stones. One was lying down comfortably. Own fault. If only they shouldn’t have become paramedics.
A friend thought I was crazy for choosing Culemborg. In The Hague and Utrecht there are hooligan-rich neighborhoods where things move faster. While the village of Veen has also been playing the Champions League for years. Let’s hope they don’t slack off there.
It’s also wonderful that the annual fireworks discussion has flared up again in an old-fashioned way. “It’s getting out of hand and we can’t continue like this!!” I think that’s so well said every year. Beautiful, powerfully spoken true words. Clearly articulated. Strong mayoral language. I would say: next year again.
Opponents of a fireworks ban remind us every year that they are not safe in traffic either. That cars kill more people than mortar bombs. And that is of course also true. I think of the Christmas market thing in Magdeburg, the attack in New Orleans and the Tesla crash in Las Vegas. Indeed: cars are not safe either.
And further? Netanyahu has been fired. Well, just out of the hospital for now. There he was helped with his bubbling prostate. The most important thing is that he survived his stay in the hospital. Those clinics there might want to be bombed. Resulting in hundreds of deaths. Also children. Screaming children maimed by fireworks. A recognizable image for us. Only these children did not set off those fireworks themselves. But Netanyahu was lucky. That seems worth congratulating to me.
In the meantime, I read all the horoscopes about what I should do with my money in the new year. I wanted to buy Blokker, but some fallen cousin of the family beat me to it. So now I’m putting my bitcoins into Lionel Messi’s listed real estate company. He has played football worth 223 million worth of bricks. You can now become a co-owner of it. I think the symbolic possession of a simple Argentinian bicycle shed would be nice. That gives such a wonderful feeling. That you are someone in the coveted world of football. An old dream becomes reality.
But first I have to buy a new car. An electric one. Then you will find a parking space more easily. Of course I can also go to Gamma for a cord. I stick it to the fuel cap of my wife’s Mini and we’ll be back in a few months.
But more importantly: will Meloni and Musk promise each other ‘eternal loyalty’ or will they honestly say that it will be for a while for the time being. And do they marry in community of property? I recommend that to her. Not him. How would he have kidnapped her anyway? Not in jeans anyway. That would be terrible. Let’s pray that didn’t really happen. Chess in jeans. I don’t want to think about it.