Ptake a break from your love life. Boysober is not just becoming a trend but seems to be a real need, especially Generation Z, but not only. Set aside romantic encounters, dates and outings for a while represents a new desire for sobriety, shared by many celebrities.
Boysober, an increasingly widespread need
Let’s put aside the image of the sad and, let’s face it, a bit “unlucky” single woman. Today being alone is above all a choice and, in some cases, also a need. It is on this basis that the boysober. We talked about it last summer when the trend was starting to spread. Today, one year later, we are no longer talking about a trend but about a real need. That of putting your love life on hold.
It is the phenomenon of Boysober, or of sobriety from men. A need that arises from a fact: in a society that has always required girls and women to have to be accompanied, to have to get engaged and then married, to have to be in a couple to feel fulfilled, today women stop and say enough to all this. Not because they have lost their romantic side, but simply because they have decided to manage their love life following their own times and rhythms. A a choice that is also carried out by some celebritieslike for example Rosalìa, Kate Hudson and Khloé Kardashianall women who have decided to pause their love as a couple for a while to focus a little more on themselves.
«Behind this word there is a trend that reflects an important cultural change: more and more people choose periods of break from romantic relationships or sex to dedicate themselves, to their growth and to their psychological well-being» he explains psychologist Lorenzo Giacomi, also available on MioDottore which continues: «the term boysober was born in the social media environment, in particular among female and queer communities, as an ironic and at the same time serious way to describe a period of abstinence from meetings, flirting, dating or relationships with male partners».
An approach that also hides a sort of relational self-discipline: especially if you have always let yourself be influenced by having to “necessarily” have a boyfriend by your sidetaking time for yourself is also a way to get to know each other better, alone and not as a couple, to listen to each other, to understand what your actual needs are and above all to recover mental energy.
Why we undertake this journey
What are the reasons that lead to boysober? «First of all a emotional overload. In particular, if you have experienced unsatisfactory or confusing relationships, you are particularly stressed. Taking a break also means interrupt the sentimental patterns that have always led to certain situations and to find calm again. The second aspect is the pressure of dating today: dating apps, with their ghosting, all the uncertainty they bring with them makes love too complex. Boysober is therefore a real necessity. In the end the need, consequently, to focus on oneself: many people prefer to commit their energies to themselves rather than waste them in relationships that only create confusion and problems.”
They put themselves first
In this sense therefore the decision not to go out with anyone is a way of self-protection and putting yourself and your needs first. Above all, to establish personal boundaries, also about what you can accept or not and how far you can go. It becomes a sort of responsibility towards oneself.
The benefits of a break from love
«First of all we start doing clarity about themselves and their emotions. This consequently leads to a greater self-esteem and a reduction in relational anxiety. You have a greater awareness of what you can accept and what is no longer allowed and you recharge yourself mentally and emotionally. Attention, boysober is absolutely not a movement that rejects love, on the contrary. It’s a new way of taking care of yourself and being more awarewith the hope of building more authentic and stable future relationships.”