For a few months now, the metal scene has been witnessing the second downfall of Tim Lambesis. And as we now know from the frontman of As I Lay Dying, things keep getting a little worse.
Dany Lambesis accuses husband Tim Lambesis of perpetrator-victim reversal
After videos emerged last week in which… Tim Lambesis kicks his dogestranged wife Dany Lambesis now speaks out again with a juicy statement. “I did not publish these videos,” she clarified on Instagram. She was referring to that video with the dog as well as a series of Clips showing the musician’s abusive behavior towards her.
These appeared last November and were confronted with a statement from Tim Lambesis that his wife had actually abused him. In a long message, Dany, who is also an active artist, now offers a look at her view of the drama that has unfolded over the past few months:
“I will no longer remain silent out of fear of Tim. The lies he told in his recent statement and in a recent podcast are deliberate attempts to obscure the truth and play the victim using typical DARVO tactics.”
DARVO is an acronym for “Deny, Attack and Reverse Victim and Offender.” It describes a manipulative response by offenders to deny and repent of their wrongdoing after confrontation.
Accordingly, Tim Lambesis’ statement that there was a complaint against his wife was also false. “There has NEVER been a domestic violence investigation against me, nor has a restraining order been issued against me. This is public information that anyone can view online,” wrote Dany Lambesis. “The videos that Tim claims show me ‘abusing’ him are instances of self-defense and outbursts against his constant physical and mental abuse and his repeated infidelity with hundreds of people.”
Reorganization of previous incidents
Dany Lambesis also addressed a statement she published in October 2024 defending her husband. Apparently it was not written by her, but by Tim Lambesis and his new managers to protect his image. “I have proof of that,” said Dany Lambesis. “Tim has repeatedly tried to intimidate me, bribe me, and ask me to include a confidentiality agreement in our prenup that says I will never speak about him publicly so that the truth will be buried when our divorce is finalized. I also have a recorded phone call from Tim a week ago in which he reassures and explains why he thinks we should get back together.”
A year ago the two appeared together:
Dany also tells another story that reclassifies Tim Lambesis’ statements. “Toward the end of our relationship, Tim said to me, ‘In psychology, when you hear a story about abuse in a relationship, you’re more likely to believe the version of the person who first told the story ‘” Dany Lambesis shared. “At the time I didn’t fully understand what he meant by that, but now it’s very clear to me. The abusive, cheating, narcissistic person will try to destroy your life and your name with lies before you can reveal the truth.”
Wife no longer wants to remain silent
“I refuse to allow dishonesty to continue to overshadow the pain and trauma I have suffered. Not just for me, but also for others close to me. It’s not just about me anymore,” the statement continues. “There’s Tim’s version of why his former bandmates left As I Lay Dying, and then there’s the truth. There is no ‘irony’ behind the timing of the dissolution of As I Lay Dying and our marriage.” And although the videos that surfaced initially brought her out of her shell, she also has a clear position on the recordings: “Out of respect for me, I ask the person leaking these videos to stop.”
A band in shambles
In the first act of the public tragedy, three out of four members of the US metalcore band left the US metalcore band within a few days last October. In addition, the tour manager had thrown in the towel. A planned tour for the new album was canceled. Due to the cryptic justifications – ex-guitarist Ken Susi, for example, wrote, his “personal morals [seien] “was put to a tough test” and he had to distance himself from the band “in order to [s]“To restore personal health and integrity” – it was suspected that band leader Tim Lambesis had abused them.
In the second act, his wife Dany Lambesis apparently appeared on the scene to deny that the musician had become violent towards her. The statement didn’t last long, however, because videos appeared showing physical altercations. In the clips, Tim Lambesis becomes physical with his wife, himself or various objects. However, the musician wrote a now-deleted post in which he spoke of a separation that had already taken place.
Contrary to what the videos suggest, there was a complaint of domestic violence against Dany Lambesis. She abused her husband. That’s a lot of hustle and bustle – so it’s no wonder that the last remaining As I Lay Dying member Phil Sgrosso, who had been playing in the band since 2002, was no longer interested. Additionally, a member of Tim Lambesis’ side project Austrian Death Machine left the group.
Tim Lambesis is a convicted felon
The musician’s background should also not be forgotten. In 2013 he was arrested because he wanted to hire a contract killer to kill his then-wife. However, he didn’t look too closely when he was hired and promptly caught an agent from the authorities. From 2014 to 2016, Tim Lambesis was in prison and As I Lay Dying fell flat. Afterwards, however, they got back together again, even with the same members as before the arrest. That didn’t last long: After an album was released in 2019, all musicians left the band except for guitarist Phil Sgrosso.