Is a no-brainer a valid option for people without brains? And cynicism the last for people with?
So, now I actually wanted to start differently, but I just came across something where young people have a problem and I think I can perhaps “intervene to help”, as my old editor-in-chief liked to say, when the ME printing deadline was approaching. At some point he stood nervously in the door and asked: “Is there anything else I can do to help here?” Which, on the one hand, of course implicitly meant: “Guys, will this stuff be finished soon?!” But on the other hand, he would have really helped us, If someone had said: “Oh, yes, please!” Can you research for me what the new second guitarist from Anthrax is called?” Hehehe, young people are giggling because they don’t know who Anthrax is and what a guitarist is, but they know what “research” means! That’s Belgian for “google it,” Boomer! LOL, ROFL, LMAA etc. Yes. Didn’t work before, embryo.
Doesn’t matter. Where was I? Oh yes. There was something on the radio about incels. You know the “involuntary celibate men”, that is, guys who, to put it in popular terms, haven’t got anything and are therefore organizing a huge misogyny, culture war terror. I’m just thinking I might have a tip – a life hack, so to speak, Dr. Summer. There used to be a motto – and perhaps it has been forgotten and would solve some problems: “If you want to fuck, you have to be friendly.” Very simple, basically no-brainer. Maybe try it out? “Men who involuntarily don’t have sex with women,” the presenter “Incels” just translated. And sorry – is it perhaps a bit embarrassing to be peddling this too? With us you would have said, “Dude, seriously – keep it to yourself, go home and jerk off.”
Re-education camp for feminists?
Today, networks are being set up and an “internet subculture” is being founded… And yes, you can make fun of it, but in the USA the incels may soon get their own ministry. Whose job it will then be to recruit women – think a little “out of the box”, think: re-education camp for feminists? – in order to then drive them to the starving celibates. Yes, gross, completely disgusting, the Winkler, what is the sick pig thinking?
Ahem, quick reality check: The Trumpers have the Senate, the Congress and the Supreme Court, and they are all dehumanized fanatics who take over. There are no limits to your sick imagination. Nothing is impossible anymore. Or would you have expected Trump to actually become president again? Yes? Well, then you’re a cynic and you’re ahead of me. I’m just getting used to it. Or would you have believed in 2001, when this brain-amputated tail with ears was seriously on our cover and many were wondering whether the ME should perhaps be helped in some way, that in 2024 someone would still be talking about Kid Rock ? Well. I think he can be Minister of Culture.
This column first appeared in Musikexpress issue 1/2025.