THE Single are happy? Putting the statistics aside, which are “cold” numbers, who is sentimentally speaking alone is happy? In general yes. Often Those who live alone have found a balance, In everyday life and with himself, who usually do not have people who live in pairs. But to break this “spell” other people intervene very often who judge and sentence the life of singles. AND Learning to “slip on” the judgment of others, when you are single, it is fundamental.
Single, how to get the judgment of others on the judgment?
If you are single, the questions to which she has undergone in everyday life and above all in some moments of the year such as Christmas, all are known to her: “random observations”, phrases thrown there that imply being alone, questions made without expecting a real answer but said because “it is strange that a girl like you has not yet found anyone”. In short, If you are not paired, at any age and above all if you are young, the repertoire is well known.
However, what annoys this situation is that often you cannot shrug the things said: you annoy yourself and remain bad, even if you have a satisfactory life and that likes. Why does it happen? «Being single is a condition of life often lived with serenity and satisfaction. However, Many single people find themselves dealing with social expectations and the judgment of others. In a society where the couple is often seen as the primary objective, those who choose (or find) to live without a partner are often questioned, recommended or judged»Explains the Dr. Lorenzo Giacomi, psychologist of myodottore.
How to learn to get your judgments slide on? 6 expert advice
How to stem the effect that the judgments of others have on us? According to the expert there are some good behaviors, 6 to be exact, to start practicing:
1. «In order not to give too much weight to the judgment of others, It is essential to recognize the value of your choices. Single it does not mean being waiting for something, but living a full and satisfactory conditionAnd, regardless of the circumstances ». In other words, you are simply single. It can be a transitory situation or not, but certainly in the meantime you live “normally”.
2. “It’s important Establish healthy borders: When friends or relatives ask intrusive questions, you can answer kindness but firmness, without feeling obliged to justify your decisions ».
3. “Surround yourself with people who support you is essential, Since those who accept us for what you are becoming a precious point of reference ». Therefore ban all people who allow themselves to judge, weigh and analyze the reason for one’s situation. They are not helpful, on the contrary they weigh down the days.
4. “Focus on what makes it happy will help to give less weight to external judgmentsbuilding a life based on your desires and passions ». Start living your life, doing what you have always wanted to dofrom the cooking course to that of photography, to making that very dreamed journey.
5. “Practicing self -compression is another key element: Respecting yourself and its times is more important than following traditional paths imposed by others. Furthermore develop self -confidence It will reduce the impact of external comments: the greater the awareness of one’s value, the lower the influence of the opinions of others ».
6. Maybe the most difficult thing to put into practice: Learn to let go Because “you cannot control what others think or say, but you can choose how to react focusing on what really matters for everyone, that is, their own happiness and well -being ».
The benefits of this approach
But what are the advantages of learning to be “sliding” judgments and so on? As the expert explains, first of all Being single is not something that must be explained or justified to others, therefore what they think is interested but relatively: «The social pressures will always be there, but learn to Not being influenced by the judgment of others is a form of freedom. When they transform your choices into a strength you understand that your happiness is the best response to any criticism and you start living with greater serenity “explains the expert.
Not only but Making a little shrug helps for example to reduce anxiety and stress Because external expectations and their weight are hit. And above all we focus better on what makes it really happy and made. Another advantage? “Improves the quality of other relationships: When you stop fear the judgment of others, relationships become more authentic, based on sincerity rather than the need to conform. In the end, A more solid emotional independence develops, learning to make decisions based on your desires And not to please others. In doing so, you give value to your path without having to justify yourself with anyone, “concludes the expert.
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