CDear Doctor,
It would be useful (to me but also to all mothers of pre-adolescents) a tutorial on how to explain their first menstruation to girls… I have a girl who is almost 11 years old and I don’t know how to express myself to explain this phase to her in the most correct and reassuring way.
a mother
Doctor Monica Calcagni responds
Dear mom,
What a beautiful and delicate question you have. She is not alone: many parents wonder how to address this issue with their daughters, because we all know that the first menstruation is a special moment, halfway between surprise and growthand we don’t want to get the words wrong.
The most important thing to remember is that for your daughter this will be a passage full of curiosity but also of contrasting emotions: a bit of embarrassment, perhaps fear, but also pride at “growing up”. And she, as a mother, has the task of accompanying her with simplicity, naturalness and love.
Doctor Monica Calcagni
Menstruation: the first two practical tips
You don’t need a great scientific speech: simple words are enough close to his experience.
- You can start by telling her that you are menstruating it is not a disease And It’s not something to be ashamed of. It’s the way the body communicates that it is growing well. He can explain it with a metaphor: “Every month the body prepares a little nest. If it’s not needed, it lets it go, and that’s the blood you’ll see.” It is a clear, delicate image, which avoid scaring her.
- Then you move on to the practical part. Tell her that you may notice some red or brownish spots on your underwear and that you shouldn’t worry. Show her a absorbent, explain how to use it, maybe prepare a small one together kit to keep in your backpack: two sanitary napkins, a spare sachet, a pair of clean panties. This gesture will make her feel ready and safe.
Don’t forget the emotions
Don’t forget your emotions: tell her that sometimes you may have a stomach ache, tiredness or mood swings. And that’s normal. The most important message is that she is not alone: he will always be able to come to her, ask her questions, tell her how he feels.
Finally, you give her a positive message. The first menstruation is not a burden, but a stage of growth. Say: “All women pass through here. It’s a sign that you’re growing up, and it’s beautiful. I’m with you on this journey.”
In this way, your daughter will not see menstruation as something inconvenient to hide, but as a natural event that marks a new phase in life.
Dedicated to mother
Dear mother, don’t be afraid of making mistakes: it’s not the perfect words that make the difference, but the tone, the sweetness, his constant presence. If she feels that she can count on her mother, the rest will follow.
Follow mine together with your daughter Course on the Conscious Cycle which I created specifically to help mothers explain menstruation to their daughters. You can find it on the site useilcervellosempre.com.
For info and contacts dial the numbers 3397247140-3737375627
Or for online consultations you can book directly on the platform Doctorium.