When can couple therapy help?
Look … If both want to work in their relationship and there is respect, therapy can make a difference. I work with techniques that help improve communication, such as active listening and first person messages (“I feel like that when this happens” instead of “you always do the same”). I also use exercises to strengthen the emotional bond, such as remembering together happy moments or expressing gratitude on a day -to -day basis.
When there is an infidelity for example, therapy helps to understand what led to that situation and to decide whether it is possible to rebuild trust or if it is best to separate. Not all couples exceed a betrayal, but the important thing is that they can make conscious decisions and not from anger or guilt.
What happens when there is psychological violence?
I have had sessions where the situation overflowed. I remember one in particular: where a couple arrived because they constantly argued. In a moment, he interrupted her, raised her voice and said: “You are useless, you never served anything.”
There I had to stop dry: “Here we will not allow respect for respect. If we continue with this tone, this session does not make sense. ” I paused and asked her how she felt with that comment. It was affected, but minimized the situation, as usually happens in cases of emotional abuse.
At that time, I knew that couple therapy was not suitable for them. I explained that, before continuing together in therapy, he needed to work in his handling and she in her self -esteem. If one of the two exercises abuse on the other, it is not a couple problem, but a problem of power.
What happens when control appears by one of the members?
I always say the same: healthy love does not humiliate, it does not control, it does not destroy. If in the relationship there are fear, insults or manipulation, couple therapy is not the solution. In those cases, the first thing is that the affected person seeks individual help and can recover their safety.
Couple therapy can be a great tool to improve a relationship, but it is not a space to justify or for abuse to appear. There are limits that cannot be negotiated, and learning to recognize them is the first step for a really healthy relationship.
LIC in Psychology / Professional Ontological Coach
Posadas María Josefina
Contact: 3517636839
@Psychologiaposadas.josefina
By CEDOC
