When we talk about duel, we do not always refer to the loss of a loved one. Duels can also arise in situations such as a move, a break in links, a change of work or any significant transformation in our lives. While the duel for death has unique peculiarities, all grieving processes share a common element: face the need to adapt to a new unknown reality.
I have traveled by several duels in my life and I can affirm that the duel is a process. A process that is experienced step by step, often slowly, and that implies a considerable expense of emotional and physical energy. Each duel is unique and personal.
What happens during the duel?
One of the biggest challenges we face in the duel is to meet ourselves again in a new reality. Depending on the type of loss, insecurities may appear on a personal, social or economic level.
It is common for mood to fluctuate: there are days in which we can feel better and others in which irritability, anger, sensitivity or fatigue predominates. Each place, situation or even object can evoke memories of what is no longer, and that can intensify our emotions.
In the most difficult moments, it is normal to feel that sadness will never leave or that we will not be able to get ahead. However, in most cases, over time and a deep personal process, it is possible to recover energy and feel again that we are in a position to move forward.
How to travel the duel?
To advance the duel, it is essential to allow ourselves to feel. The emotions that emerge should not be repressed or judged; They need space to be expressed. It is equally important to seek containment in people who make us feel good and, at the same time, respect our need for loneliness if we wish.
When sadness feels overwhelming and seems unsurpassed, seeking professional help can be an invaluable tool. A psychologist can accompany us throughout this process, giving us a safe space to explore and process our emotions.
The learning that leaves the duel
Although traveling a duel can be deeply painful, it can also become an opportunity for learning and personal transformation. Duel confronts us with our vulnerability, but also with our strength.
Many people, through this process, discover aspects of themselves that they did not know before: a greater capacity for resilience, a deeper connection with their emotions or a renewed perspective about what they really value in life.
This does not mean that we should romantize pain or think that the duel “makes us better.” Rather, it is about recognizing that, although the loss can change our path, it can also be an invitation to grow, to redefine our priorities and build a new version of ourselves.
Post-due learning is not immediate or linear. It arrives over time, once we have allowed emotions to find their channel and have accepted, even partially, the new reality. Looking back, many people manage to identify small or great changes in their way of being, to relate to others or to value their lives.
In short, duel is a path that we all travel at some point in life. Although it may seem endless and heartbreaking, you can also open the door to a deep transformation. It’s not about forgetting what you lost, but to integrate that experience in your history.
If you are going through a duel, remember that you are not alone. Allow you to feel, seek support and give you the time you need to rebuild yourself. And when you are ready, you will discover that inside you reside the necessary force to meet again with life and with the possibility of being in peace again.
Lara Levyon
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@psicolalevyon
3415198573
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By CEDOC