ANDQuilibrio Vita-Lavoro or Worklife Balance. How many times have we heard of it and how many times we have thought of this abstract concept as the keystone to succeed to better reconcile the private sphere with the professional area? Probably many, although perhaps the real question to ask would be another. How many times have we really managed to reach that agreed balance?
The false myth of life-work balance
“That of life-work balance is actually a great false myth For many reasons – he explains Debora de NuzzoTrainer, Mindset Coach and organizational well -being consultant. – First of all it is not realistic: Just observe our everyday lives to realize that reaching the perfect balance is impossible. Not only that, to aspire to the work-life Balance it is also very harmful to our psychophysical health, because It only does not generate feelings of guiltleading us to think of ‘Don’t be capable’. I think for this the time has come to tell us about the truth and tell us that It is not true that we are not capable But that is that concept of balance that is not sustainable ».
Life-work balance: as people we deserve more
«All of us We deserve much more than a simple balance – The expert continues. – We are not jugglers we are people: the very concept of ‘balance’ refers to something temporary, precariouswhile we, also as workers and workers, rather deserve a harmonious life ». The secret, according to the coach, is in fact in that word, ‘Harmony‘, which also gives the title to his recent book (published by Il Sole 24 Ore): a manual that offers readers concrete and practical ideas to achieve that much sudden Wellness-life wellness. “That of harmony is a concept that does not imply perfection but that puts us in contact with a more real life, more true – explains Debora de nuzzo – in which there are periods that can go differently from others without this means to say ‘here, I can’t do it’. Is a In short, I invite you to harmonize everything that really interests us, Leaving to our power that ability to feel good and to achieve what we also want to work ».
The cover of the book ‘Armonia’ by Debora De Nuzzo (edition Il Sole 24 Ore)
Even that to work is life
Harmony means primarily stop considering only what happens to us out of the professional sphere. A trend that may seem at first glance healthy but which is not actually good. «We often forget that Even when we are working we are living – explains the coach. – To think that life is simply what happens to us outside of work is not good for our mental health and not even to companies or the company who want to improve the work environments. If we continue to think that our life is out of work We will never put ourselves in a position to really improve our professional environments. We must consider our life in all its entirety: only in this way could we begin to take the situation in hand and to improve all those aspects of the professional sphere that do not make us feel good and that lead us to think that our serenity is far from there. If we live with the thought that our well -being is limited in Augustwhen we go on vacation, or during the weekend, when we are not in the office, this will not help us improve all our days, including those in which we are at work».
Life-work harmony: how to exploit the summer break
Rather than living with the nightmare of the return to the office in September, because not to take advantage of the summer holidays to think about How to return to harmonize everything that interests us? In this regard, the coach provided us with some starting tips.
First rule: stop referring to the holidays using toxic expressions as ‘Detach the plug’ «We are used to giving little importance to words but instead the terms we use have a strong impact on our way of thinking – explains Debora de nuzzo. – the phrase ‘detaching the plug’ which is one of the most popular expressions, especially in this period, is to be avoided because We are not no thorn to be detached from no grip, we are people. Who need to work well, to rest just as well and live well in general ».
Do not ‘cut out’ but devote yourself to time
Another useful suggestion? Make peace over time. «On vacation as in everyday life we have to stop thinking that we have to ‘cut out’ time for us: we must not carve out but devote us time – underlines the expert. – Dedicate implies the pay attention to what has really importance for us: when we are focused on an activity, let’s do it with exclusive attention, We care about what we are thinking and doing. This will help us make peace over time, stopping doing many things at the same time. We can also take advantage of the holidays to train this ability, so that in September it turns into a habit».
Life-work harmony: why invest in your personal growth
Another fundamental step: invest in your personal growth. «There is no improvement in our professional conditions if we do not improve as people – invites you to reflect the coach. – The time we invest in our personal growth, it is not time wasted because When we grow as people we grow in all the environments we frequentincluding the working one ». Small habits that can also help on holiday to invest in their personal growth? “Light It helps us to travel with the mind, to get out of the stories that we tell and live every day to enter other stories and make ourselves inspired by activating new thoughts – suggests Debora de Nuzzo – I recommend novels or training essays that is, texts that as they read contribute to enrich our form-action that is, to give good and new shape to our actions ».
Handwriter
“Also Writing by hand to write down thoughts, phrases for us significant, moods It helps us to enter more confidence and in tune with our ideas and ways of thinking and therefore in greater relationship with the care and time to devote to ourselves – continues the expert. – Also, i Benefits of hand writing are remarkable: Among these, the recovery of attention by the brain is refined and can be A real therapeutic activity that reconnects us to our emotions and to our inner world and therefore to our needs that are the basis of any path of growth and change. Both these practices could become appointments to be maintained even when they return from holidays ».
Train kindness
Holidays are the ideal time too To reflect on our ability to communicate and relate to others, A decisive factor with a view to life-work well-being. «We can and we must learn to use communication as a wellness tool, for Create positive relationships that can also improve our working environment – suggests Debora De Nuzzo. – Kindness trains in all environments: that it is simply to order a coffee at the bar, As we talk to the people we meet helps us not to take things for granted and above all to have respect for the work and time of others. A factor that proves to be essential also to improve our work environments and our relationships with colleagues ».
What if the work environment is toxic?
What if the holidays lived just like an escape route from a toxic and not very sustainable working environment? “There is a capacity for responsibility that each of us can implement – suggests the expert. – When you are in a toxic situation at work, the instinct is that of blame something outside: To the head, to the environment, to the colleagues … let’s try to overturn the perspective. A practical strategy can be to ask yourself: what am I doing to improve my situation and my work environment? What are I proposing different to go in a healthier direction? The secret to feeling better is Don’t wait for something outdoors to always to bring us wellness but to be able to create it from inside, doing it become contagious also for others ».
Wellness-work wellness: the ‘I will think about’ trap in September ‘
In short, attention to the classic but insidious ‘I will think about it in September’with which we try to pause any working problem, in the illusion of postponing. «Are we really sure that in September we will think about it? – invites you to reflect Debora De Nuzzo. – September is the month in which everything starts again: Better not to get there without knowing what lifestyle you want to live with lifestyle And what dreams do they want to realize. This certainly does not mean giving up the qui-e-hour holidays to think about the future, but remember that The future comes from what we decide to do in the here and now. In the‘Attention and in the care that we consciously decide to dedicate to our well -being and what matters to us today. So It can also be done in September but why not think about it now?».
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