The moment when Derk Jan Tuil from Aalden met his – now – wife on the Malaysian island of Borneo lasted no more than a few minutes. Minutes that have grown into almost a quarter of a century. The two still live near the place where it all happened in 2001.
As a world traveler, visiting a National Park in the state of Sarawak is primarily like many of its other tourist destinations. “We had to store our things in a locker there,” Tuil explains.
The woman who sits behind the reception and takes the group to the lockers is the Malaysian Helina. “That went very cheerfully. She seemed very friendly, so we just clicked.”
It is clear to Tuil: he wants to get to know this woman better. “So I asked straight out, ‘Are you married too?'” That turns out not to be the case. “I said, OK, can I have your address then?” Tuil receives the address on a note. “I took that with me. When I was back in the Netherlands, I wrote to her and then emailed her.”
Afterwards it turns out that Helina also had her eye on Tuil. “She chatted with the other clerk and said I was going to be her husband. It was meant to be.”
Contact at a distance is easy, and both are interested in each other. “After six months I went back for a few weeks to get to know each other better.” A year later, Helina comes to the Netherlands for a few months, which further develops their relationship.
“She is gentle, very friendly, loving and hospitable. She happened to me. It just happened. Then we tied the knot and got married in Sarawak, Malaysia in 2003.”
The choice to move to Malaysia was also quickly made for Tuil. “It was now or never. After our wedding, she came to the Netherlands for another six months. She missed her family, and I missed the warm weather. So we went back,” he reflects.
But his life in Drenthe is also worth a lot to him, although the desire for adventure appeals to him more. “I always thought: I would continue to live in Drenthe. I lived in Aalden, which suited me perfectly. I was very active there. I was with the film house in Emmen, the hospital broadcaster, the singing group, volleyball, swimming. It was a nice village with a lot of activity and good neighbors. When we decided to go to Malaysia, the neighbor said: ‘Why are you leaving? You belong here.’ But I thought: why not, you should also have a bit of adventure.”
The adventure has attracted him all his life, Tuil explains. “I used to travel a lot. India, China, New Zealand, South America, Alaska, Canada. I once built a camper. I used it to tour all over Europe. As a teenager I rode all over the Netherlands on my moped.”
The desire for the unknown is in his blood, and emigrating to Malaysia suits him like a glove. Now twenty years later he has found his niche and he and Helina built their own little paradise. “We are in the middle of the jungle, with a view of the mountain. Early in the morning when I wake up I hear all kinds of birds. Our garden is full of fruit trees: bananas, pineapple, mango and rambutan.”