«Noand the long afternoons at the parks I honed my already existing relational and negotiation skills. I am able to carry out any activity with only one hand and 2 hours of sleep behind me». There is much, much irony in the CV that Taryn Di Ventura has prepared for Mother’s Day. A lot of irony that helps to focus on the truths and obstacles of the “profession” of mothers. But also various perversions of our labor market, which are worth knowing. Perversions that Di Ventura deals with daily as a consultant – specifically – for women who return to work after maternity leave with his project A job for mom.
The mother’s curriculum: the soft skills acquired in the “care work”
«This curriculum vitae is a game, of course, which highlights how being a mother is a job, a job of care, and also how many skills this job brings into play and refines. That is to say the so-called soft skills».
We read from the curriculum: Team management of 3 internal people and 4 external collaborators (grandparents) and relative definition of tasks according to personal skills, competences and inclinations. Management and prediction of problems and unforeseen events related to illnesses, accidents, various bad luck, changes of plans e whims and relative adaptability, speed of action and stress management. Management, organization and coordination of all family and personal activities in collaboration with business partners (husband, grandparents, babysitter).
A mother lacks nothing to be successful at work
«Contingency management, lateral thinking, problem solving they are skills that are really useful for working in the company. And a new mother has them, of course. This should, at the very least, give some serenity to those who return after a pregnancy: those months were not “lost” on the training front, on the contrary ». The colleague’s joke “So, did you rest on maternity leave?”, can be answered with serenity. No, really, we haven’t rested.
How to write a resume (without mentioning motherhood)
But these soft skills should be demonstrated rather than listed, both in the CV and during the interview: «On both occasions we need to keep the focus on the objective and remind ourselves that these are not suitable moments to talk about our private life. Not even writing, or saying, that you are a mother is “in focus” with the goal». At issue are the skills, not the family organization, which each one manages as she believes, without the employer having to care: so why talk about it? “On the contrary, you have to appear serene and reliable.” The question is precisely this: a mother can be serene and reliable, as many examiners still find it hard to believe.
Experiences, skills and little “human side”
In general, however, and it also applies to men, “even saying too much about oneself, delving into the human side, tends to be of little use, if not counterproductive”. It could have worked a few years ago, not today, in a hyper competitive job market. Not only that: often, in the early stages of a selection, the CVs are examined by software that “read” only the raw information, and certainly are not fascinated by the story of an interesting personality. Personality that will emerge in due time, during the interview (if it arrives).
The profile: a few lines to give an idea of oneself
«To introduce yourself, and give an idea of who you are, you can use the 6, 7 lines of the profile». Also in this case, less is more: «It is worth choosing a couple of soft skills, the most useful to the company. And specify what experience has led to acquiring them: the connection to the real data is fundamental because it gives value and concreteness to what otherwise remain words». In short, it is too easy to profess to be a guru of problem solving or organization without isolating which passage of one’s life has made us the geniuses we say we are.
No endless lists: what does the company really care about?
As for the skills and experience to write in the curriculum, pay attention to quality and quantity: «It’s better to choose only those that are interesting for the company, calibrating the CV on the reference sector. No to endless lists: distraction and confusion are just around the corner». Here others mistakes to avoid when writing a CV.
A recent training course, the extra gear in the curriculum
The extra “line” to add to the CV? «A training course done after maternity leave, focused on an aspect of the profession that, perhaps, has become “hot” in the last period». Which? «Just do a little market research on your sector: what specifically do the job advertisements ask for? Does the candidate have everything she needs by choice or, given the break she took for maternity leave, did she miss out on any transformation or novelty? ».
Work interview
If the selection phase based on the CV is successful, it is mandatory to remain calm even during the interview. «Preparing yourself well, about the company and about yourself: is there a skill they need that you just don’t have? Don’t talk about it first but be ready to give an answer if they ask you about it”.
I find out I’m pregnant during the selection: when do I tell?
Taryn Di Ventura’s final piece of advice is for women who find out they are pregnant while applying for a job or who want to interview, but are pregnant. “No, don’t say that right away, unless you’re applying for a job that’s considered risky, in which case you couldn’t be hired, pregnant. Wait especially if you are at the beginning of pregnancy: you risk appearing anxious and not having clear ideas about the reasons for a possible refusal. At the end of the selection, the pregnancy in progress must instead be absolutely revealed. “Just as issues concerning permits and breastfeeding must be addressed”: with calm and self-confidence and in one’s professionalism. And in the fact that everything will be fine.
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