Well understood guilt can be a sign that we broke our own value, which sometimes is neither chosen but imposed. Thus give us the opportunity to repair. But many times we live it as a conviction that fills us with negative judgments about our identity: “I don’t serve”, “I am a disaster.” These limiting beliefs condition and perpetuate the pain.
From my experience with people seeking to free themselves from these charges – through coaching, NLP, social psychology, the enneagram among others – I have verified that assuming an error is much more liberating than hiding or denying it. When we are responsible, we take power to the victim and break the vicious circle “guilt-manipulation.”
Because the more guilty we feel, the easier they manipulate us. Instead of assuming and repairing, we hide what we did to avoid feeling bad people. Thus a toxic dynamic is born, such as that of the master and the slave of Hegel’s philosophy: a mutual submission relationship.
Breaking with this requires courage and honesty. Who assumes his mistake without victimizing, is released. Raises your conscience, cuts toxic links, puts limits without guilt and leads clearly and authority.
After almost 15 years rubbing people with my project positively – coaching, leadership and management – I can affirm that whoever manages his guilt, lives with inner peace, makes assertive decisions and builds strong, healthy and authentic relations. In a world where submission is current currency, assuming makes us truly free beings.
Does this dynamic of guilt resonate you? Do you dare to make a change positively to live in peace and fullness?
Dare!
Positively
Coaching leadership and management, personal development
15 6028 3209
Paula Esther Positieri
Lic. In Administration, Ontological Coach, practitioning in NLP, Higher Technique in Social Psychology, certified in FFHH and CRM granted by ANAC. And others.
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