As a man, you should be in charge of your woman and not show any emotion: that is the image that many guys on social media are presented with about how to behave like a ‘real man’. With a new campaign, the Rutgers knowledge center and other organizations want to break through persistent macho norms among boys. The focus is on young people in rural areas, but according to Ronald Hein of Link Jongerenwerk this also applies in the city.
The campaign ‘Small things !@#%? be big !@#%? things’ is mainly aimed at young boys who live in rural areas. “We know from previous research that young people in rural areas have fewer examples of people who do not meet that masculinity standard,” explains Hester van Soest of Rutgers knowledge center.
Masculinity standard
By this masculinity standard, Van Soest means the idea that men are not allowed to show emotion, that they have to score with the girls, that they have to be in charge of their wives and that they have to participate in drinking.
“We think it is important that masculinity norms or macho norms are discussed among young people,” Van Soest emphasizes. “And specifically with boys, because we see that they can suffer from this. All the little comments like ‘Don’t be a sissy’ can add up to something bigger. As a result, boys can experience loneliness or peer pressure.”
But how do youth workers who work with boys from rural areas view this? Ronald Hein is a director of Link-Jongerenwerk. That organization is active in Alkmaar, Edam-Volendam, Hollands Kroon, Schagen and Landsmeer. According to Hein, it’s not just country boys who have these kinds of thoughts. “The boys from urban areas also have these ideas.”
Yet he also sees differences between the two groups of young people. As an example he mentions the campaign ‘We claim the night’, which is about women and girls wanting to be able to walk the streets safely at night. “That works much better in urban areas than in rural areas.”
Hein sees a change in how young people view relationships between men and women. Some would like to return to the more traditional values between men and women. “That is a concern among young people.”
Text continues under the photo.
The director of the youth work organization believes it is good that attention is being paid to this through this campaign. “It is good to draw attention to these relationships and to discuss the question ‘What is normal?’. As youth workers, we are always open to this.”
Andrew Tate
The campaign specifically mentions an influencer like Andrew Tate, who negatively influences young boys with his misogynistic statements. Hein sees that every now and then. “Fortunately, it is not everyday. It has not become the norm.”
From time to time he sees extreme thoughts about the relationships between men and women in reports from youth workers. Hein sees such excesses more often in boys from urban areas.
Young boys are easily influenced, Hein explains. As an example he mentions the riot surrounding rapper Boef a few years ago. He mentioned two women kechsslang for whores. “The young people think: if he says that, I can do it too. They do not see that it is only a revenue model for Boef.”
Mirror
His youth workers talk to the boys if they notice that they have extreme ideas. “If we notice something like this, we raise it. We call it mirroring. Then we ask questions like: ‘What are you saying, what do you think about that, how do you come to that conclusion and what do you think about it?’. It is good to have a conversation about that.”