Ua demeaning mixture of sexism, bullying, misogyny and stalking awaits girls on social networks. A violence which, moreover, is now perceived as normality. And it also has a tangible impact on real-life behaviors. Affecting the mental health, career, parenting, of women, especially adolescents. A survey just published by Girlguiding (the English association of girl scouts) reveals, in fact, that for almost half of the young people between 11 and 21 years old, sexism and online bullying prevent them from feeling safe in everyday life.
Sexism, bullying, stalking… how bad it is to be a girl on social media
The percentage of those who identify with this state of mind has more than doubled compared to ten years ago and the complaint adds to that of those who, one in five, suffered digital stalking (that is, he received unwelcome messages or received insults and insults, ed.). One in three girlsFurthermore, received unsolicited sexual images. The numbers that photograph social life are merciless, especially in describing the relationship between technology and younger women. The Terre des Hommes 2023 report showed, in fact, that 45 percent of those who suffer online violence, in any form, belong to Millennials or GenZ.
An easier target
Why are women the ideal, easier target? «They spend more time online than men, because for them connections are more important. And then they are judged above all for their appearance, not for what they write or for their actions” explains to iO Donna Kara Alaimo, Italian-American, professor of Communication at the Fairleigh Dickinson University of New Jersey, author of the essay Over the influence which analyzes the toxicity of digital media for the female gender. «Unfortunately, there are many dangers. We constantly come across men asking for sex and sending obscene photos. There is a risk of sextorsion (those who extort money so as not to disclose intimate images of victims), of revenge porn (who publish private photos, often of their ex-girlfriend) and then everything that young people scroll through their pages can impact their mental health. I think of the beauty and lifestyle standards imposed by various influencers. Girls often feel like their bodies and existence aren’t up to par with others. In reality, we know that people post heavily filtered and curated versions of their appearance and lives. Platforms should write a warning on all manipulated images.”
For girls, being on social media often means becoming victims of sexism, bullying and stalking (Getty Images))
Virtual and concrete life influence each other
The anxiety that these continuous and impossible comparisons cause has been highlighted by many studies. The most recent is that of the University of Oxford, which launched BrainWaves research. For ten years it will follow over seven thousand students in the United Kingdom, but the first results are already unequivocal: the link between time spent on social media and symptoms of anxiety and depression is very solid. And if you are a woman, the effect of online interactions can be worse than that of reality, because virtual and concrete life influence each other, creating a vicious circle of abuse. «Digital contempt is the mirror of a patriarchal society and of the exclusion of women from rights» tells us Ilaria Masinara, head of the campaigns of Amnesty International, which every year publishes the Hate barometera project that measures online discrimination.
«For the female gender, hatred is intersectional. You are attacked because you are a migrant and a woman, gay and a woman, black and a woman. We have noticed how politics can sometimes promote and push bubbles of hatred. If politics chooses for us, for example on the right to abortion, it means that it places us in a weak, vulnerable category, indirectly legitimizing attacks by web users.” The normalization of hostility is the other piece of the issue. «If it becomes increasingly acceptable to discriminate against women on the web, this translates into violence and abuse in reality» agree Masera and Alaimo.
The worry of perfection on social media
Rosalind Gill, professor of Inequalities in media, culture and the creative industries at Goldsmith University in London, wrote Perfect an essay in which reflects on the unprecedented pressure that forces girls to look perfect on social media. A pressure that does not usually affect males. «It scares women to be publicly criticized even by friends, to receive negative comments on what they wear or because they have retouched their photos too much or because they post too assiduously or because their content seems fake» she tells us. «All this is a source of unimaginable anxiety. Which girls never talk about, neither to their parents nor to their friends. Keeping everything inside.”
Those who are pregnant and young mothers are instead an easy target for fake news and misleading information about how to be a “good mother.” «Many of these notions are proposed by non-experts, they are false and dangerous – continues Alaimo – There are those who suggest recipes for artificial milk or giving birth at home, but unfortunately there is no safe way to prepare artificial milk in cooking and home birth drastically increases the risk of death of newborns. The so-called momfluencerswhich make everything seem so easy, can also undermine mothers’ mental health, making them feel like there’s something wrong with them if they can’t get their baby to sleep through the night or keep the house clean.”
Even professionals who would like to gain an advantage by using social media have to come up against prejudices. «Experts in any field have fewer followerstheir content is relaunched less frequently and they have fewer business opportunities than their male counterparts” notes Alaimo. «This is because when people imagine an expert, they often imagine him as a man. So when they look to professionals for information, they turn to men.”
The right answers to give
Girlguiding research highlights that despite abuse, girls tend not to close their social profiles due to “Fomo” (Fear of missing out), the fear of missing something. But according to the experts we consulted, asking women why they don’t abandon Instagram & co. or to propose to do so would be offensive. Walking away is not the solution, for Masinara, because this would leave the platforms in the hands of extremists. And for Gill, asking women to give up these tools is equivalent to blaming them. «Many close their digital profile, unfortunately» admits Alaimo. «And in this way they are silenced by the bullies. It’s outrageous to suggest girls leave. Social networks should instead expel abusers.”
Ban violent people on social media or smartphonesHowever, It doesn’t seem like an effective solution. We need dialogue and awareness, especially among the very young. Platforms should act much more decisively in clamping down on sexism and misogyny, but what can users actually do? Alaimo suggests three simple steps: follow more women on social media, when we see that someone is being abused online (regardless of gender), post positive comments to defend them and report the abuse to the platform asking for it to be removed: «If all readers did these three things , I believe we could radically change social networks to empower ourselves and other women.”
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