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Like many Americans, Jimmy Kimmel is puzzled by Donald Trump’s mysterious throat rash – which the late-night host now refers to as a “big red something.”
“Hard to believe Melania needs another reason not to sleep with him,” Kimmel joked. “Or maybe she tried to strangle him in his sleep.”
He added: “Reporters have asked about it. The White House initially claimed it was a kitesurfing accident. No. So far they have refused to provide any detailed explanation. So we decided to investigate ourselves.”
Kimmel’s bizarre interview
Kimmel then took the investigation into his own hands – by interviewing “Donald Trump’s bad blue baby hand.” The late-night show featured a bright orange hand topped with a sweeping Trump wig and a large bruise. “I was hoping you could tell us what the rash is about – or whatever is going on north of you on the president’s neck,” Kimmel said.
“It’s not a rash,” the hand answered in Trump’s voice. “The neck is just a little sore from all the medals he’s worn. We won so many awards. The FIFA Peace Prize. Olympic gold. A Lifetime Achievement Award from Arby’s for eating 10,000 beef and cheddar sandwiches.”
Elsewhere in his monologue, Kimmel addressed Trump’s confusion over whether the U.S. was actually at war with Iran. “He keeps calling it a war. We’re now on day five of whatever this is,” Kimmel noted. “Pete Hegseth said today, we’re just getting started in Iran. They’re still trying to figure out who will be the next Supreme Ayatollah of Iran.”
Diaper rash up to neck
Kimmel had already made Trump’s rash an issue on Tuesday evening and joked: “Who knew diaper rash could go so far?” He added: “One thing we know for sure: It’s not a hickey from Melania. It’s probably a vampire bite from Rudy Giuliani or something. Every day our president looks more like Pizza the Hutt from Spaceballs.”
