Singer couple Sonja Lumme and Arne Nylander reveal the secrets of their marriage.
Mushrooming discussion at the summer theater – that’s how the singer couple started Sonja Lummen61, and Arne Nylander’s, 51, first meeting. At that time, Lumme had joked to Nylander that he needed a strong man to carry a basket of mushrooms in the forest.
– I thought it was just a small basket, Nylander tells Iltalehte with a laugh.
According to Lummi, it wasn’t love at first sight, but feelings began to develop over time. Now the couple has been married for 17 years.
The everyday life of two freelance artists is often very hectic. Both are very career oriented and therefore they allow each other to focus on their work. Sometimes that means Nylander is working longer at a theater in another city, and both travel a lot for their jobs.
They feel that mutual understanding is one of the key factors in being able to combine work and relationship successfully.
– You have to know how to give the other person space and peace to do their own thing. Sometimes it’s just better to shut up and let the other person be. There’s no need to look for reasons why the other person is so nervous or tense, sums up Lumme.
– It also helps to be able to talk to someone about things, Nylander continues.
Arne Nylander often asks his wife for help with premiere rehearsals. Sonja Lumme often reads scripts aloud with the actor. PASI LEISMA
The two have also worked together. Neither of them finds working together difficult, and they may work together in the future.
Lumme admits that sometimes it is challenging to put work aside and focus on the relationship. However, solutions have been found.
– We have talked about marking certain days on the calendar that are sacred only to us, Nylander says.
– Even a small release has a big meaning when done correctly. It’s important that we don’t just become colleagues, Lumme emphasizes.
Age difference discussion
The couple has a 10-year age difference, which some people have found strange. The two themselves do not want to give prejudiced comments any weight.
– We have not gone along with it because the age difference is not an essential thing in our relationship, Lumme states.
The couple’s most important way of spending time together is picking mushrooms in autumn. PASI LEISMA
The couple themselves do not even pay attention to their age difference, because it is not reflected in their relationship in any way.
– Maybe you would notice it more if we were younger, because then we are living in a different phase. At this age, we are already established adults, Lumme reflects.
Ex-spouse involved in everyday life
Lumme’s ex-husband, a guitarist Matti Auranen is still very present in the couple’s everyday life. The couple broke up already in 2003, but according to Lummi, they are still in touch every week.
– Also because he still works in my company. He is also my good friend, Lumme explains.
– For example, when we were on vacation, he came to look after the house because the cats had to be taken care of. He is happy to help if needed, as we are him too, the singer adds.
According to Sonja Lumme, her ex-husband has none of their business, and Auranen does not interfere in them. The same is also true the other way around. PASI LEISMA
Lumme emphasizes that Auranen does not interfere in their lives in any way. There is only friendship between them these days.
– I have never understood why a person who was once dear to himself would suddenly turn into an enemy. Sure, in some cases, relationships may have soured during the separation, but maybe in such situations it wasn’t really about love. But if there has been violence, excessive alcohol use or cheating in the relationship, of course I understand the breaking of the distance very well. A good friendship can no longer be born from that, Lumme thinks.
– But in our case, our friendship remained, and that’s not a bad thing at all. The men are also friends with each other, and I don’t always join their conversations, he adds.
The couple has similar values and they value each other extremely much. – You don’t take yourself or others for granted, Lumme states. PASI LEISMA
According to Nylander, he and Auranen often discuss music and send each other funny memes. There is therefore no jealousy in Nylander and Lumme’s relationship.
– People have girlfriends or boyfriends since they were teenagers, and you can’t feel jealous of each of them. There must be trust in another person, Lumme states.
– Our union is a thing left behind. It doesn’t always even come to mind that we were once married, he continues.
Lumme sums up the situation briefly: the previous marriage has ended for a reason. The singer feels lucky to have two wonderful men in her life: one is a friend and the other is a husband.
It could well be said that Lumme and Nylander have been together for more than twenty years for a reason. Finally, the couple summarizes what they value in each other.
– I value Sonja’s intelligence and sense of humor. He is a good-hearted and friendly person, Nylander praises.
– I appreciate Arne’s curiosity about life and the fact that he considers other people. He makes my everyday life easier and makes my life better. He has also made me a better person, Lumme praises.
Even their height difference does not cause problems for the singer couple. PASI LEISMA