S.turn off unnecessary lights, turn on the dishwasher and washing machine only when fully loaded, take super fast showers. Since August, government commercials and consumer associations have been suggesting virtuous behavior to lighten gas and electricity bills. Which arrived on time, very salty. And the competition has started, among friends, for the most “saving” energy council. I have lost them all. Proud to have understood, by sifting through the electricity bill, to have a contract with hourly bands of electricity consumption, I started doing laundry (without boiling the sheets at 90 degrees) strictly at night, when you pay less for energy. «Nice discovery! I’ve been arguing with those downstairs for months because of my night washing machines. When the spin cycle starts, his house shakes »confesses his friend Stefania, a new member of the“ washing machine-only-on-Sunday ”club.
But who knows the cost of the kilowatt hour?
A tip: don’t get caught unprepared about the kilowatt hour price. Because now after the classic: “Hello, how are you?”. The question arrives promptly: «But you, what energy supplier do you have? What contract? ». And don’t be mad when you find that your friends all have, I mean all, a much more advantageous contract than yours. And they boast about it. Except for those who confess that they have been scammed, unfortunately, by the operators who call at any time of the day. Nothing compared to having to confess it at home. “Honey, I have to tell you something. But swear you won’t get angry. ” “Did you buy that dear designer micro handbag that doesn’t even fit your house keys?” Silence. “I changed my energy supplier. I was wrong and now I think we will pay more ». If he forgives you, it is true love.
In the jungle of offers
Let’s face it: changing operator and choosing the free market offer that best suits your needs, comparing the different rates on the market, is more difficult than playing on the stock market. Impossible, then to understand why I got a stratospheric bill in the months I was not in the city. The eco-friends, always them, feed my creeping sense of guilt: “I bet you left the refrigerator running for two months”. True. “But have you at least disconnected the wi-fi?” But when ever … “And the alarm?”. Well, if I don’t plug it in when I’m not home, what did I install it to do? “Have you communicated the meter reading to the electricity company?” I always forget it. But where did they all follow the crash course in home economics, since until yesterday they only talked about handbags and beauty creams?
First rule of energy saving: turn off the light
Oh well, I will study over the weekend. Meanwhile, I have learned to turn off the light when I leave the room. Nothing to do, I was also last in this round of consultations: I have platoons of friends who, now it turns out, have been declaring war on the red lights of household appliances on stand by for years. Others in the evening take advantage of the glare of the external lights, those of the public street lighting “that with the shutters open you can see very well even at home”. Then in the chat they annihilate me with their deep-rooted habits: «after shampooing, towel-dried hair to use the phone as quickly as possible». “Pizza? It is heated in a pan with a lid, never in the oven! ” The vacuum cleaner? It has cobwebs, it’s back to broom and dustpan.
The energy certification of our appliances tells us when they consume. (Getty Images)
Heating, but how much does it cost me?
On heating in the house the discussion is heated: there are those who, for the love of Planet Earth, have never turned on heaters for years, not even in the middle of winter in Milanwho only starts them up when he gets home from work: he opens the door and is careful not to take off his coat and hat and then, in the evening, goes to bed in a ski suit, fleece hat (and hot water bottle ) including, who in the morning is careful not to open the windows in order not to waste the heat. There are those who arm themselves with chutzpah, sit at the bar with their laptop and work all morning in the warmth for the price of a cappuccino.
Eco revenge is used … in the cold
I give up, I am an irremediable wasteful, to try to recover ground in terms of energy saving I will try the silver heat reflective panels for radiators. (But does the silver side lean behind the heaters or against the wall?). Not even the time to grab the last three available from the hardware store, and obviously the friend immediately jumps out: «Why did you buy them? I build them myself: I flatten a cardboard box and cover it with silver paper, the kitchen paper ». I remind you, out of pure evil (but I have the extenuating circumstances: I was provoked) the fee of the architect who furnished the house: what would you think of the supermarket cartons behind the designer radiators? In the meantime, I stocked up on candles for Christmas dinners at the supermarket, meditating on subtle echoes of revenge: this year Christmas greetings dinner at my place, in the cold and romantically in the dim light, like at home, right?
When the refrigerator is cooking at home
I just have to study to dispense imaginative and unprecedented bill cutting tips. Cooking in airtight jars during the dishwasher cycle? Miserably failed and cleverly silenced experiment. Instead in the refrigerator the couscous is great: directly from the package I pour it into a bowl and place it in the cold, together with cherry tomatoes, lemon, oil and very little water. Nobody believes that it is very good. And they joke about it: «What did your fridge cook today? Did they give you Michelin stars for your fridge? ‘ I raise: «Girls, you are truly ancient! Have you ever tried raw desserts? Sustainable cakes to be prepared with the oven off? “.
Cooking with low energy impact is the latest trend. Obsessed with overcooked vegetables, I have always turned off the stove in advance for optimal cooking, which is completed with the heat of the pot. Only the mother complains: «These courgettes are completely raw!». Then he thinks about it for a moment and remembers the “cooking box” to continue cooking food without using gas, a wooden box insulated in recycled wool, with an airtight lid, in which the pot with the food was inserted hot. “Mom, I’ve never seen anything like it in the attic at my grandparents’.” “Maybe during the war, when we were displaced.” At the word war, yesterday and today, there is little to joke about. But there is a limit to energy saving: no Nobel Prize in physics or starred chef will convince me to cook pasta “with the fire out”, that is, by turning off the gas immediately after throwing it into boiling water …
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