If you men think: it was nice and quiet at work last week, that may be true. Because the women were not there. Last Monday was Equal Pay Day. The day on which women – symbolically – work for free for the rest of the year. Because they earn on average 10.5 percent less per hour than men.

A friend texted: ‘Really chill! No hassle on your mind and you can continue working. I only had to get the coffee myself. But beyond that? We’d love to see you again next year!”

Haha. Just kidding! The women were just there, of course. Far too busy to protest against unequal salaries. And of course it should also remain fun. But the fact remains: we work for nothing until the end of the year. If you look at the difference in average annual salary (according to CBS 32 percent less) between women and men, we could have even stayed at home since September 1.

What I often hear about the pay gap? That it is logical that women earn less than men. Because the women spend too much time worrying about the children, work in the wrong sectors, work too much part-time, and cannot negotiate.

But are those really the causes? Or are those just excuses? Otherwise, let’s put them all through the meat grinder.

1

The pay gap is shrinking! Yes! Hurrah! Especially in government, where salaries are public. In sectors where the boss is allowed to decide for himself, it is often still a matter of crying.

2

At the banks otherwise the wage gap would only be 1 percent! Yes, the adjusted wage gap. The unadjusted pay gap is still 9 percent at KNAB, 20 percent at Rabo and no less than 29 (!) percent at Nationale-Nederlanden. You can drive a nice lease from that.

3

Yes, hello! Women work in lower jobs at banks. And why are they there?

4

Because women have less ambition! Or because they get fewer opportunities?

5

Women more often work part-time – then you shouldn’t complain. And do you know why women more often work part-time? Because, wait a minute, they do EVERYTHING. Sure, some women are spoiled part-timers who prefer mint tea. But there are also those who are boss brats, who cover study days and replace sick teachers. And oh yes, also have a job.

6

Women want that themselves! Yes dude. We enjoy the stress intensely. And the guilt. Or do we ‘want’ it because some dads don’t do it?

7

Women without children also work part-time! Yes. But that doesn’t explain the salary difference either. Because even if you adjust for part-time work and lower positions, the pay gap is still there between 4 and 9 percent.

8

That’s just a few percent. Well, great. We then ask men to transfer that ‘small amount’ at the end of the month to a national redistribution fund.

9

It is prohibited by law to pay women less than men for equal work. Yup. Driving through red lights is also prohibited. Lighting fireworks at a football match. Sitting on the train without a ticket. But strangely enough, you do get a fine for that.

10

The Netherlands is doing very well. Eh. According to OECD figures, the Netherlands has fallen 15 places in the world rankings for gender equality this year. Today we perform worse than Slovenia, Greece, Turkey, and Hungary. Even Belgium is doing better, god better.

11

Women work in ‘soft sectors’ that pay worse. Yes, and why do they work there? Because they can work part-time there more often? Or because they don’t have to break through the glass ceiling again?

12

But young women nowadays earn more than men, right? Yes. Because they are better educated. But from about thirty years of age. Or wait, that is the age that many women (want to) have children.

13

Then they shouldn’t have children. Haha good one! That really helps your salary! In the six years after the birth of the first child, the income of Dutch mothers drops by an average of 35 percent. But be careful. Even without children, we often lag behind around 30. Just the thought that she can get pregnant and he cannot, makes him ready for the next step sooner than she is, research shows.

14

Men also drop in salary after having children. No. Men actually get a baby bonus. Responsible breadwinners are popular during performance reviews. Or well, the men.

15

Women cannot negotiate. When women negotiate: “Wow, aggressive. Take it easy.” When men ask the same thing: “He will go far.” It’s that simple.

16

A law will be introduced that will require companies to be open about the differences between women’s and men’s salaries. Yes, and Feyenoord will get a new stadium. And the Lely line is coming. Ever.

17

It’s all just very complicated. No, it’s just too expensive to pay women more equally. Nobody has an interest in it. Or well, except for 50 percent of the population.

18

Women simply have to do more work themselves! Fine. What do you propose? Work full-time? We still earn less. Negotiate? Then we are too eager. Maybe we can get our children adopted! Or become a man! Or add proof of sterilization to application letters!

You know. I’d rather not hear anymore why women earn less. But what are you going to do about it? Wage gap in your pants, we used to say on Twitter. But damn.

It’s right there.





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