Fear drove Päkä to incubate his solo project: “I was afraid I would be alone”

Päkä, known from the Gazelles, was afraid that he would be laughed at with his solo music. That’s why the favorite band had to have serious discussions about their future.

Rap musician Päkä, known from Gazelles, is exciting. He admits that it is due to the new situation: now we are not talking about Gazelles, now we are talking about the one hiding behind the Päkä artist name Pekka from Salmis.

In November 2022, Salminen released his first solo album, whose lyrically dark tones sometimes delve deep into Salminen’s own mental landscape.

Although from the ranks of the Gazelles, Miikka Niiranen and Tuomas Pietikäinen have already tried their wings on a solo career before, Salminen’s own project caused the most anxious discussion about the band’s future.

It was because Salminen was afraid.

Depression childhood

In the armpit of Pukinmäki, located north of Helsinki, there is a district called Savela. The whole story of Pekka Salminen, 32, but also his friendship with his bandmate Hätä-Miikka, aka Miikka Niirasen, started from the roof of the low concrete buildings.

– I was born in Savela and Miikka was also born in that same house. Miika and I have lived on the same path our whole life up to now, and in Savela we lived a pretty typical depression-era childhood.

As a child, Salminen dreamed of a career as a professional athlete. Jenni Gästgivar

For Niiras, music had been a defining factor in her life and dreams since she was a child. Salminen, in turn, only fell in love with rap music when he was a teenager.

– Not if I had a dream as a child, it was related to competitive sports.

In middle school, Salminen was in a sports-oriented school and that defined his whole life. However, something happened in his teenage years that made him give up on his childhood dream.

– At some point, it started to dawn on me that my talent is not enough to reach the top in sports. Until then, it had seemed to me the only thing worth pursuing.

When sports were no longer at the center of Salminen’s life in high school, he felt that he was lost with his identity. However, rap music offered a new kind of grip.

– Music was played on the bass radio and I could somehow relate to those artists and their lyrics. I thought that there is something here that needs to be explored.

Success

In 2023, Gazellit is one of Finland’s most famous bands. The songs of the ensemble founded in Helsinki’s Oulunkylä have been streamed tens of millions of times on Spotify. Concert stages have been toured diligently for almost a decade.

When the Gazelles take the stage, they are like a party train pushing forward with determination.

– We have a certain kind of energy. Such positive, empowering and communal. It’s sometimes a narrow place for an individual, because I also have that other side.

In addition to Salminen, the Gazelles include Miikka Niiranen, Tuomas Pietikäinen and Jussi Mikkonen. Jenni Gästgivar

The coronavirus pandemic stopped the steaming locomotive of Gazelli and it made Salminen think concretely about his own solo album for the first time.

– I wanted to shake the bars a bit, that I am much more than the happy and energetic guy in Gazelles.

Finally, in November 2022, Päkä’s first full-length play was published. A hit album-named entity descends into the comparatively darker waters of Gazelles with the support of more classic Finnish rap. According to Salminen, the texts are sometimes even painful reminders of the past.

– In my mind, the events of this album take place in 2019, when we were roasted to the max with the Gazelles.

Before the coronavirus pandemic and the forced shutdown it brought, Salminen began to see a significant conflict between his own well-being and entertaining others.

– I was completely exhausted and at the same time I tried to offer those who bought their tickets to our gig the everyday escapism and fun that they came for. It made me wonder if there is any point in this.

The title of Salminen’s new album was also taking shape at some point A lost album.

– A cheap play on words, but it has a deeper level. Success has been a really intoxicating and wonderful experience for me, but it has its flip side. One lost one’s own values, such as presence and family-centeredness, driving around on the road chasing that dream.

Salminen was afraid to present his solo music to others. Especially the reactions of those closest to me were frightening. Jenni Gästgivar

A place for discussion

If Salminen didn’t make rap music, he would write lyrics in another form. Text and authorship are important things to him.

– That’s what defines me. It’s great that there are rappers writing in Finland too. They draw a lot from Finnish rock and the fact that there have been many writers there. Now it is done in a new musical form.

Despite his solid identity as a writer, he was afraid to publish his own solo songs. The fear of being laughed at clouded my mind.

– My way of doing things is that I am quite sensitive in the making phase. I didn’t even want to show the Gazelles to anyone what I was doing. They knew I was doing something, but had no idea what.

Only when Salminen was ready to present the album to record companies, the band also got to hear the material. Although the other members of the band have also had solo careers, Salminen’s project caused a lot of uncertainty regarding the future of Gazellie.

– After the fact, we have had to discuss the fact that my method of operation was not correct. Actually, I was just scared to show them, but to others it appeared as secretiveness.

Salminen feels that the reason for fear and pawning solo material from the other Gazelles was that they are so close to each other.

– What if they had said now that this is bullshit? I was afraid that I would be left alone with that matter and thought, what is the point of this? Such a completely irrational fear of failure and being laughed at reared its head.

From Oulunkylä to eternity

When Salminen was actively playing hockey, there was no talk of feelings or personal weaknesses in the locker room. Salminen learned to hide his own sensitivity behind a loud shell.

– I grew up in dressing rooms, where in some places a rather harmful male model was maintained. We didn’t have a place to vent that sensitivity anywhere.

After slowly growing up, in addition to music, another way to process emotions was found in therapy.

– Or at least I got the keys to how to handle them.

Seeking therapy was a long process that had nothing to do with music and making it. The source of creativity was not sought there.

– I am there for completely different reasons. I do active work so that I can be the person I want to become.

Salminen found more keys to dealing with emotions in therapy. Jenni Gästgivar

Although Salminen talks about his success cautiously, it has not come by chance or easily either.

– Yes, a lot of work has been done and dreamed about.

In the successful album, we return to Oulunkylä and cycle the asphalt roads of the Helsinki suburb. Although Salminen no longer lives in North Helsinki himself, rapping in Savela and Oulunkylä is an important reminder of his own roots.

– I remember where I came from and where I’m going. And that you can move on even from difficult things.

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