THEntrire a journey alone For a woman it may seem like a bold choiceat times frightening. Yet, for many, this is revealed The only possible way not to give up the desire to leaveespecially when the summer arrives and finds ourselves, for different reasons, without travel companions. So how to make this lack an opportunity? We asked the Dr. Marinella Cozzolinopsychotherapist and clinical sexologist.
“Recycle relationships”: a double -edged sword
«The reasons why you find themselves can be many: you are not in pairs, the friends are, or maybe the holidays do not coincide with those of the people we would like to share a holiday with. At that time The temptation to “recycle” relationships is born: a distant cousin, a youth aunt who has just separated, a friend who has not been feeling for years but of which it is known that it has returned single. Often, however, These solutions are transformed into disappointing experiencesfull of expectations and unbalanced in needs. Traveling with someone can only work if there is a very high level of mutual confidence oron the contrary, if you are so little linked to be able to allow themselves to establish rules clear immediately. Sometimes, only with those who know us deeply you can enjoy the freedom to say: “Today I don’t come to the beach, I want to shop” or “I need a day for myself”, explains Dr. Cozzolino.
Traveling: Better Sun
“Also Sharing common spaces can become a problemunless there is a natural balance or very honest communication often, when you involve someone with whom you don’t have a really alive relationship, perhaps people who have not been seen for years, you fall into the trap of gratitude. As if, accepting to come with us, the other he was doing a favorand this puts us in the position of having to reciprocate, accepting compromises that do not make us feel good. It is a mechanism that is activated just when, on the other hand, you need freedom more. So why not leave alone? The truth is that, especially for those who have never done so, it is one of the most important experiences to do “, underlines the expert.
An indispensable experience
“Booking a trip on your own means Choose your company, learn how to be enough, overcome fearschallenge the conviction of not being capable. It is an excellent gym, since you learn to choose, to manage unexpected events, to get to know each other better. For many women The first big rock to overcome is to have dinner at the Ristorante da Soleovercome the idea of being perceived as “bad luck”. In general, the absence of a witness to share with a nice sunset or an excellent dinner, With which to build the memories of the holiday It can create discomfort. But just that moment can become a gesture of freedom. After, it will be even more beautiful to tell not only the good moments, but also the embarrassment, the initial fear, the satisfaction of having put themselves at stake. The important thing is not to start with excessive expectations. No guaranteed miracle, only small steps: Choose destinations that is not too isolated, so better a village or a small center rather than a hut in the mountains. Yes to the means of transport that make us feel safe: those who are afraid of the plane will opt for train or car. In any case, it is good to have reference points and numbers to call in an emergency “, recommends Dr. Cozzolino.
Traveling alone: a way to get to know each other
“It is an experience that enriches. Even if you are mothers of small children, it can be useful to try, even for a short period. It serves to prepare, one day, to give your children the courage to do the same. Travel alone makes curriculum, teaches autonomy, gives tools. And if it is true that a woman alone can feel more vulnerable, it is also true that more and more women decide to carve out this space, even if only for a few days. A trip on their own Allows you to really do what you wantwithout compromise. Many people, on the return from holidays in company, admit that something did not go in the right direction: small frictions, different needs, forced choices. In some cases, the other becomes a scapegoat of our dissatisfaction. But how much would we have fun alone? If I know what I like, if I can listen to me, I can build a perfect holiday for me, without satisfying anyone, without justifying myself, without giving up anything. Traveling alone is not just a way to leave: it’s a way to get to know each other », concludes Dr. Cozzolino.