TOThis question will be answered millions of times and for that I apologize. Unfortunately her things until they happen to you on her skin you do not recognize them, you do not understand them but above all you do not feel their gravity. It happened to me too, now it’s my turn to ask her for help. My name is Federica ho 31 years old and a child of three. Ever since I got pregnant I don’t have sex anymore. I don’t care, I’m not looking for them.

    I am not satisfied with my son’s love, as my sister often tells me. It’s not that and I’m sure, but I don’t know what it is and why. I live as if suspended between a thousand tasks and worries. I have not worked since he was born e I would like to go back to work, I still spend many nights awake because he calls at least a couple of times. I specify that I managed to remove him from the Latvian only six months ago and he is still not completely used to it. I clean the house all day, take and pick him up from school, shop and iron … I no longer have the propensity for any playful activity, including sex. But with this life how could I? I would be happy if he would give me some advice. Federica

    Marinella Cozzolino’s answer

    Doctor Marinella Cozzolino, Psychologist and Sexologist

    Dear Federica, I do not do it, I will state it, but I would like to be able to answer you with a single sentence, just one question, six words that would be enough: who did you have this baby with?

    The real problem isn’t sex

    In the long letter, which I cut for space reasons, there is no trace of your husband. I’m married you say, then nothing else. It is there key to your problem. The chores, all of them, are on you. It will be, as often happens to many women, because you don’t work … You also know that it’s not true that you don’t work, right? Leaving your job is already a chore, a fracture, an exclusion from the social and adult world which, as you can see, you pay for. Are you disappointed in married life? Are you frustrated? Are you mad at your husband? I really think so.

    The sex you no longer want and the desire to control everything

    But ask yourself how coincidental all this is and how much it was wanted, paradoxically, by you. Do you want to manage the house and the baby? You want to feel strong doing it all by yourselfdo you want it or is it he who has denied himself, who has left you alone with everything? Try to get back to work as soon as possible, even a few hours a day.

    Involve the partner in the care of the baby

    She begins to leave the house without deformed overalls but like a woman who goes to work. Take care of the house as soon as you can but she lets your husband help you. Also involve him in the care of the baby. Let some tasks be his: the bath in the evening, the fairy tale for sleeping, let there be some rituals between father and son to help build a relationship between them and free yourself for a few hours.


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    Sex and desire start here

    Talk to him before you think you might want him. Explain to him how you feel, let him help you, support you, give you that sense of protection that you are missing right now. Tell him that you need to feel that you have someone next to you in order to want him.

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    Dimmy, the psychologist 7 days a week

    From an idea of ​​the Doctor Marinella Cozzolino, Psychologist, Clinical Sexologist and President of theItalian Association of Clinical Sexologyis born Dimmy, the psychologist 7 days a week from 8 to 24. «The goal is to bring psychology to as many people as possible. With Dimmy the psychologist is online.

    This means that even those with complicated work shifts or those who travel a lot for work, those who live in small centers where there is no psychologist close to them, those with physical movement difficulties may have the opportunity to undergo therapy. Everyone can choose the place, day and time they prefer to talk to their professional ”, says the expert. All at an affordable cost.